What Was Lost
by Placidmage
Summary: Heero has amnesia and Duo is given a mission to take care of him. Will their feelings finally surface? Can the former partners realize that memories are only things, and that nothing was lost? 1X2 (I'm back!)
1. 1:1 Lost

I put lots of emotion into this A love is recovered, but it seems that it is lost.  
  
1+2, of course  
  
Incomplete, but to be finished soon, I hope.  
  
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Part 1: Lost  
  
The click of feet on a hospital room floor woke a startled Heero, who apparently had just woken up after two whole days of unconsciousness and much-needed rest. He tried to sit up upon instinct, and when a sharp pain shot into his back, found that he couldn't. But when he tried to move his legs, there was no response.  
  
Dr. Sally Po walked by and saw her patient awake! She ran in to confront him.  
  
"Heero, how are you feeling? We'd predicted you'd be out for a week. It's practically a miracle that you're awake so soon. You've been asleep for two whole days. We almost didn't think you would make it out of that plane crash alive." The doctor paused and waited for a response, but when there was none immediately, she became worried.  
  
"Heero.?"  
  
"Hn?" was the Japanese boy's first response, "My name's Heero, huh?"  
  
Dr. Sally's eyes widened as she realized that the Heero didn't remember!  
  
"Yes, it is. Your name is Heero, Heero Yuy. What do you remember? Do you remember the accident? You were the only survivor."  
  
"No."  
  
"Well, what about the colonies, what about Quatre, Trowa, Duo, and Wufei? Do any of these names sound even remotely familiar?"  
  
"I think so. maybe?" The cobalt blue eyes mused, playing the names over on his lips. "Duo." he stopped for a second and repeated it. He looked confused. "Duo. That name sounds a little less distant than the others."  
  
"Ok, Heero, you just rest for a little bit. We need to rest those legs of yours if they're ever going to get better, because right now, according to our specialists at the hospital, if you even strain them the slightest bit over the next couple of months, they may never recover." She paused for sincerity, "Do you understand? Heero?"  
  
"Yes, I do." He remembered that he couldn't move his legs earlier. He hoped that those people she had mentioned could help him.. He felt so helpless.who were they?  
  
Sally left the room to let Heero figure things out.  
  
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ A few weeks pass _ _ _ _ _ _  
  
(*BRRRIIIIINNNNNGGGGG*) Duo listened as the phone rang and then picked it up  
  
"Hello, you've reached 1-800-HELL. This is the God of Death; speak at your own risk." Duo laughed devilishly as he waited to hear a click and a dial tone on the other end of the phone line.  
  
"Duo, this is Sally Po. I hope you don't do that to everyone who calls you."  
  
"And why not? It certainly keeps all those pesky telemarketers away." Duo explained casually as he bit into a tuna sandwich.  
  
"Right." Sally was never one to argue with Duo, especially about those odd quirks he seemed to so enjoy. "Anyway, Duo, we have a new mission for you."  
  
"Ok. What is it?" Duo took another bite of the badly prepared tuna and waited for a reply.  
  
"You see, Heero was in a plane accident, and he survived." Sally was interrupted  
  
"No surprise there." Duo put down his sandwich and worriedly asked, "How is he?"  
  
"He's lost the use of both his legs, for now, they're looking into how they can possibly get them back. It's his spinal cord."  
  
"Is he alright? Did he ask for me? Where is he? I'd like to see him, I."  
  
"I'm getting to that." Sally interrupted him for once. "Heero doesn't remember who he is. He, actually, can't remember anything." She stopped.  
  
  
  
Duo froze. How was this possible? It couldn't be, it just couldn't.  
  
"Sally, you've got to tell me where he is. I have to see him." Duo was very concerned, for both Heero. He couldn't think of anything else at the moment, he didn't care about anything else. They had always been the best friends that anyone could ever imagine. But sometimes, Duo snapped into his senses, like now, when he realized that it was more than that.  
  
"We're talking about your mission now, Duo." Sally said seriously.  
  
"Sally, what do you mean? Why the hell are you bringing up some meaningless mission? Get Wufei to do it. I have to see Heero, and there's nothing you can do to stop me!" Duo said, apparently confused, and with good reason.  
  
"Duo, calm down. This IS your mission. Duo, Heero remembered your name. It's the only thing the doctors could get out of him, and it's the only the only thing they've been hearing from him during Heero's past few days at the hospital. Actually, he's a lot more talkative than he ever was before. He says he remembers the name, Duo. but he doesn't remember anything about you. The doctors say that the best chance for the recovery of Heero's memory would be to relate to the things he already remembers. Heero is a very crucial factor in this war, as are you and the rest of the gundam pilots. We can't afford to loose time. Your mission is to bring his memory back, or retrain him, whichever you choose."  
  
Duo stared at his wall, so happy he could hardly think straight. He did catch the part about Heero being talkative (Boy, was that a laugh). But he couldn't get over the fact that Heero remembered his name. He wanted to know if Heero really loved him back. That guy was so caught up on his being a perfect soldier that Duo was pretty sure Heero did, except he didn't want to form a bond with him, for fear they would loose each other, and that would be too difficult for a suicidal like Heero to bear. Damn it! Why hadn't Heero ever told him how he felt!  
  
Duo had tried to forget about Heero during the time they had been apart, but he would never forget how he felt when Heero had clamped his hands on the self detonation device and actually pressed it. Duo's heart skipped a beat and he held back tears and prayers until he got back to the base where he sat in his Deathscythe for hours, wetting the seat with the tears of a broken heart. And the same thing happened when Duo found out Heero was alive, but that time, they were tears of relief. Duo had tried so hard, so many times. Dropping a hint here and there, but it hurt so much. He loved everything about Heero. His cobalt blue eyes, alluring deep voice, the way he pointed his gun said 'Omae o korosu', and yes, even Heero's trademark spandex shorts. Duo loved him so much that it hurt. Duo was always in pain.  
  
"Hopefully the connection he has to you, whatever that might be," Sally said knowingly, "will bring back something. Duo, I've sent you the details by e-mail. Heero's things will arrive by special delivery sometime tomorrow. You'll pick him up the day after."  
  
"Yeah, Ok." Duo said, as unfocused as he was. "Heero remembered my name?"  
  
"Yes, Heero did." Sally knew this meant a lot to Duo, she had also put in a good word for his responsibility while they were deciding weather or not Duo was reliable. She knew that her friend needed this chance. She could tell he was in love. "Duo?"  
  
"Yeah?" Duo asked as he snapped back into the world of the living.  
  
"Duo," Sally said in gentle advice to her friend whom she knew was desperately in love, "Don't blow this. This is your last chance. Tell Heero how you feel."  
  
  
  
Duo was taken aback. "How long did you know, Sally? Am I really that obvious?" He asked with concern for his reputation. Everyone knew Duo worried about his reputation.  
  
"Well, I don't remember who the first to notice, really was. It became common knowledge pretty quickly among us all. This was years ago. We're all cheering for you, Duo, but don't push it. I know you won't. Heero is really stubborn and his feelings are few and delicate. You have to take the accident into account, as well."  
  
"Yeah, I know." Duo smiled at knowing he had someone he could talk to about this sort of thing. "I'll. I'll try." Duo said, uncertainly.  
  
"Good. See you sometime, and good luck." Sally hung up the phone and Duo hesitated in putting down the phone, because he know that she was right. Weather she had been wishing him luck on the mission or luck with Heero, Duo couldn't tell, but either way, this was his last chance. If he couldn't get Heero's memory back, Duo was fairly convinced that no one could.  
  
. Heero had remembered his name?  
  
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _  
  
The next day Duo woke to the sound of the doorbell. It rang again and again and again. He then heard fearsome knocking on the door.  
  
Duo covered his ears with the pillow and shouted to no one in particular, "Go AWWAAAYYY! Do you know what time it is???!!" Then, while he was saying this he realized that he had just woken up and he didn't know what time it was either. Looking at the clock, he saw that it was a quarter past eleven.  
  
"Heero's a morning person, I think," he said in contradiction to himself, because he obviously was NOT!  
  
The doorbell kept on ringing until Duo simply couldn't stand it any longer. He came out of bed sluggishly in nothing more than a pair of black boxer shorts, slipped on some slippers and a nightshirt, and yelled, "I'm COMING, just stop ringing the friggin' doorbell!!"  
  
His braid had come mostly undone during the night, because he was a restless sleeper, but you could make out some remnants of a braid somewhere in the silky mess of chestnut brown. Duo cared about his hair, but he wasn't about to look nice for some doorbell- ringing freak waking him up at 11:15 on a Saturday.  
  
Duo opened the door and the deliveryman felt very uneasy looking in the 'I'm not a morning person' glare of a customer in a nightshirt. The deliveryman was the first to speak.  
  
"Hello, miss, I ." the deliveryman paused when he saw that Duo's glare had become a threatening death stare (of course failing to begin rivaling that of the perfect soldier), and the deliveryman wondered why. There was no question, though, when the customer spoke for the first time in a deep, and might I add 'ticked-off', masculine tenor.  
  
"It's Mr. Maxwell, thank you. No offense taken, of course." (Although it was clear the braided boy was very offended).  
  
"Oh, umm, sorry, your hair.I mean.it just looked." Duo held his hand up for silence and the deliveryman continued, "I have a delivery for Mr. Heero Yuy."  
  
"Ok," Duo became very cheerful all of the sudden, remembering that he was going to see Heero, his Heero, tomorrow. "He's not here right now, but I'd be happy to sign for 'im." Duo took the deliveryman's clipboard and signed his name as the man gave him a rather small box that was binder-sized and considerably light.  
  
Duo thought this was rather strange. He'd thought when Sally said "Heero's things" she meant a bed and dresser, sleeping bag at least, something a little less. small. He guessed at that point that since Heero moved around so much that he didn't have the travel space for anything much.  
  
"Thank you, and sorry about the.you know." The deliveryman left Duo to his package as Duo walked inside and placed the package on the table.  
  
"Wait a second." Duo said in realization of the contents of the box as he began to rip it open, "Oh, no, not this thing again!"  
  
Duo tore the laptop from its packaging and held it with both hands. Duo smiled and remembered the hours he had talked with Heero, watching him and loving it, competing with the damn laptop for Heero's attention.  
  
Duo recalled the times he had roomed with Heero on their missions. Duo would have been resting in the room, probably going over some top secret documents, doing paperwork, or tending to his hair. You wouldn't believe how long it takes to brush. To Duo, his hair was everything, and proper care of it was on his list of priorities.  
  
Heero would walk into the room in a bad mood, or so it seemed. Duo always greeted him cheerfully, and he rarely ever received anything past a grunt of acnowlagement. Sometimes he didn't even get a grunt. Duo would make a face as Heero went straight for his laptop. It was strange that even after so many years Duo could still remember the sequence of beeping noises it made as it turned on.  
  
*********Flashback*******  
  
"Hey Hee-chan"  
  
"Hn." Heero answered as he turned on the laptop.  
  
"What do you think all those beeping noises actually mean." Duo asked as he brushed his hair for about the hundredth time.  
  
"Baka." Heero murmmered.  
  
"No, really, Hee-chan. Is it like computer language or something? I mean, you should know what it means. You're always hacking into bases and stuff with that thing. God knows you've decoded enough messages filled with nothing but '1's and '0's. If anyone can decode an oral computer message, you can."  
  
"Hn." Heero's laptop was booted up and he immediately began to hack into Oz's most secret military base to find its location.  
  
"I think the computer's trying to tell you how much of a jerk you're being, Heero," Duo said in annoyance and began swiftly tying his hair back into a braid.  
  
Heero spent the rest of the afternoon silently in front of the computer, without even looking back once to see the desperate look on Duo's face.  
  
******End Flashback********  
  
"You know what?" Duo said to himself deviously as he brought the laptop to his room, "He doesn't need to remember this."  
  
With that, Duo shoved the laptop into the garbage. Heero wouldn't be seeing it for a while.  
  
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _  
  
The next morning rolled around pretty quickly. Yesterday, Duo went shopping and practically bought the whole store out with instant food products that any baka like him could figure out how to make, as well as five of his favorite ice cream flavors.  
  
Duo woke with a start from his alarm clock that he had so willingly set for 6:30 the night before. He promised himself to get up early that morning so he could get the drive to the hospital over with, and he could be there when Heero woke up. He was so looking forward to it. And he almost forgot about the whole thing as he jumped up and mumbled to himself a couple things (I cannot mention for fear this fanfiction will get an R rating) to the alarm clock, and covered his head with a pillow.  
  
Duo was just about to hit the 'snooze' button when he realized.  
  
"Heero!" He jumped out of bed excitedly and began to dress himself. "I promised myself I'd be there early for ya buddy, 'because you need me right now, for once, more than I need you."  
  
He stepped into the bathroom and splashed some cold water into his face to wake him up a bit, and he fingered the dark, tired circles below his eyes. He hadn't gotten much sleep the past couple of nights. He had been up too long thinking about Heero. Duo stopped for a second I wonder if Heero ever stayed up all night thinking about me.  
  
After he was all ready to go, he undid his hair, combed it, and braided it again. He did this quite quickly, and when I say quickly, I mean about a half an hour. Do you know how long it takes to brush out that amount of hair?? Actually, Duo's hair was amazingly soft and untangled for its length. He might not have bothered to comb it at all, had it not been for his apparent vanity and all of the memories that rushed back to him as he cradled his chestnut locks.  
  
Now, onto breakfast, he thought with anticipation. The baka had no idea what he was getting himself into. After burning the toast, and nearly making the house catch fire as he attempted to make pancakes, Duo decided to settle for a plain roll that he grabbed as he raced out the door and stuffed into his mouth as he opened the car door and jumped in, braid racing behind him in a hopeless effort to catch up to its wild partner.  
  
As he backed out of the driveway and raced recklessly down the street, all he could think about was Heero and a mouth full of a white roll that felt hollow as it went down his throat. But no matter, he was going to see Heero, and Heero was going to get his memory back, Heero was going to walk again. Duo knew, because that was the way it was supposed to be. he fingered the crucifix that hung around his neck.  
  
"Yeah," he mused, "The way it's supposed to be."  
  
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _  
  
At the hospital, Sally Po was doing her best to answer all of the questions that Heero had. Heero had woken up at a surprising 5 in the morning talking to the security people outside his door (just in case Heero got his memory back) and begging for the good doctor, Sally, who had to be dragged up out of bed and to his side at his request.  
  
Heero looked at his hands and then to Sally before speaking to her.  
  
"Gomen, Sally"  
  
"It's no problem, Heero. Just tell me what's wrong. Did you remember anything yet?"  
  
"Well, I had a dream about a braided baka who didn't tell me his name." He looked dreamily at the wall opposite his bed. "He and I were in mobile suits. I'm a mobile suit pilot, aren't I?"  
  
Sally nodded intently, of course knowing that he was talking about Duo. "Is that all you remember about your dream."  
  
"Hai." Heero said regretfully. He hoped she knew who the other pilot was. He had to be real, he just had to.  
  
"Heero. It's obvious that you remember this pilot; he's not a figment of your imagination at all. His name is Duo Maxwell. The specialists and I have arranged for Duo to take care of you for the next couple of months until your leg recovers." Sally thought she saw a smile on Heero's face at this.  
  
"Duo Maxwell?"  
  
"Yes. You and Duo were very good friends. He was very happy to accept the responsibility of taking care of you. He's also very concerned about you. In fact, he's coming today to see you. And if you so choose, to take you back to his house."  
  
Sally looked hopefully into Heero's strangely happy cobalt blue eyes that seemed to sparkle as he looked through the doorway as certain braided someone in a priest's outfit ran down the hallway, in pursuit of the room he apparently had just passed.  
  
Heero gave Sally a raised eyebrow, and Sally exclaimed quite surprised at Duo's sudden entrance, "Well, speak of the devil." as she heard the rapid click of black boots down a tile hospital hallway.  
  
And as Sally left after him, to show Duo to the room, she could have sworn she heard Heero muttering, "baka."  
  
Duo was the first to walk through the doorway, with the swish of a braid to the right, Duo looked at Heero, rendered absolutely speechless.  
  
Sally saw Duo's expression from the hall and giggled to see the young man so totally smitten even after years of separation.  
  
Heero saw only the striking violet eyes underneath those invading bangs, almost in disbelief that Duo could look even more gorgeous in person than he did in his dream.  
  
Sally put her hand on Duo's shoulder and snapped him to his senses. Duo smiled widely as he greeted his friend. After all, they were, as of now, just friends. How could they be anything more than that with Heero and his memory?  
  
"Hey, Heero! Feeling OK? Remember me?" Duo was glad to see that Heero looked as cute as ever, even in a hospital gown. Then Duo remembered that Heero would look good in anything. Duo smiled teasingly at the thought of Heero in a dress.  
  
"Duo?" Heero said tentatively.  
  
"Hai. It's me, Heero. How are those legs of yours? Any better?"  
  
Heero thought about how Duo could think of his legs at a time like this. He barely knew who he was; much less did he care about the conditions of his legs. Of course, Heero couldn't blame him for being worried.  
  
"Hn? They're just the same, Duo.but.thanks for asking." Heero looked down at the bed that held his legs, or so he was told. Duo advanced to the chair aside Heero's bed and didn't hesitate to sit down.  
  
Duo took a backward glance at Sally, "Hey, Sal, am I authorized to tell spandex boy about his past, about our past, or should I just take it slow and talk about the weather or something?"  
  
Heero shot a glare at Duo by instinct. Talking about him to someone else while he was watching the whole thing was very rude, and he resented Duo's referral to him as spandex boy. Wait a second. Heero realized that's why his legs felt so loose. He must have worn spandex! Heero tightened his glare on his braided friend.  
  
Duo turned around after hearing Sally's response, saw the Yuy death glare, and chuckled.  
  
"Well, Heero. It looks like you haven't changed a bit."  
  
Heero was struck by this comment as he realized that he didn't know who he was, and yet this beautiful stranger seemed to know everything about him. Heero loosened his stare and looked at the Deathscythe pilot in a way that made Duo smile with agony.  
  
Duo wanted to kiss Heero so bad when he made that face, that face just melted him away like a blowtorch to an ice cube. It was right. This was right. And he was crying inside, because he knew he couldn't touch Heero, and he asked himself, if that was the way love felt because he always felt that way around Heero.  
  
Heero noticed Duo's distress and tried to comfort him.  
  
"I'm so sorry Duo. I've done something to upset you."  
  
"No, no" Duo said as he smiled genuinely at Heero, "I'm sorry. I was just daydreaming, is all. I'm back now, Hee-chan. Please, ask me anything you want to know."  
  
"Tell me about who I am Duo." Duo was startled by the question. Did he know better than anyone else, now, who Heero Yuy was? This was a frightening thought, because he regretted not knowing very much at all.  
  
"It's not pretty, Heero. Our pasts aren't pretty. Do you still want to know? It might serve in your favor if you find out on your own, later." The Wing Zero pilot showed no signs of dropping the topic.  
  
"Please, Duo." He said. (Please? Duo thought to himself. I never thought I'd see the day.)  
  
"You are an orphan, like me. You were trained to be a professional assassin from when you were 7 to when you were 15. We were sent down to earth to fight for the colonies. Just like me, right?" Apparently it was useless asking questions to the amnesic soldier.  
  
"Go on, Duo. I need to know about my past. I think I'm remembering something." Heero really wasn't remembering anything, but he just wanted to hear Duo's voice.  
  
"We're 17, you know. We've only known each other since we came here to Earth. We, I mean, you stopped the war." Duo remembered how they first met and chuckled once again at the remembrance.  
  
"What is it?"  
  
"Oh, nothing." Duo stopped laughing, "Just remembering the first time we met is all."  
  
"Tell me."  
  
"You sure. This might make you a little hesitant to stay in the same house as me after you leave the hospital." Duo raised an eyebrow.  
  
"Positive." Heero felt perfectly sure it couldn't be that bad.  
  
"Alright then. When I first met you, you had your gun up at Relena (she's the scary chick who you'll probably see in a few days because she has a monster crush on you) and you were about to blow a hole in her head when I came by and shot you first." Duo apparently thought this was hysterical.  
  
"That's not very nice." Heero said with apparent shock on Duo's part. Duo agreed, but obviously saw the other side to the situation.  
  
"You're absolutely right. Which is why, when you attempted to shoot her a second time, I shot you again. You still have the scars, you know?"  
  
Duo began to roll up the sleeve on Heero's right arm. Heero at first tensed at the physical contact, but then eased his arm down and relaxed it. Duo had a very gentle touch. The touch of his hands was like a cool autumn breeze. They were cold, with the blood of the people who died beneath them, but warm with the soul that cried for them. Heero was reminded of his hands, they felt so cold and melted at the brush against his arm.  
  
Heero's heartbeat sped up. He wished Duo would never stop, but then again, the longer it took Duo to roll up the sleeve to his patient's gown, the stronger Heero's desire to pull him closer became. Is this what love felt like? Had he felt it before?  
  
Duo took his time, because he wanted to feel Heero's skin, but it couldn't last long, so he finally finished and pointed to a small, bluish looking scar on his upper arm near the shoulder.  
  
"That's the first one. Doesn't look like much, does it? Just show it to me whenever you want to get me to do something."  
  
Heero slightly raised his eyebrow, and Duo chuckled as he explained.  
  
"You showed them to me once when we were roommates on one of our earlier missions.so that I would clean up my side of the room. The guilt gets to me every time."  
  
Silence drew the room into a state of suspension, as blue eyes met violet. They didn't need memories, but I wish they had known it. Duo couldn't stand it any longer, and as much as he wanted to stay there by Heero's side, it was too painful,  
  
"Ok, Heero. I need to go get a drink of water, I'll be right back." Duo watched Heero nod in consent as he exited the room, drained emotionally. He could only wonder at how Heero could make him feel that way. His knees were weak, and Duo felt like he could burst into a thousand pieces and not feel any pain. Nothing could have been greater than the pain Duo was feeling right at that moment.  
  
Heero just frowned, after Duo left the room. He was still unable to remember anything, but wanting to remember. He wanted to remember everything. But he was afraid. The only person he could slightly remember was Duo. Why was the braided boy so important to him, he tried to think. Was it the way he felt so warm and comforted at Duo's presence? Or perhaps the aching Heero felt when Duo's hand brushed his shoulder.  
  
Then it hit Heero. What if Duo didn't want to be around him anymore, why would Duo want to be around him? He was just a worthless, handicapped, memory-deprived idiot in a hospital bed. After their meeting today, Heero was so sure that Duo would never come again. And then, Heero did something surprising, he started to sob.  
  
Sally heard this sob from her office, and it wasn't one she had ever heard before. As she walked around the corner she noticed it was coming from Heero's room. Sally had never heard Heero cry, and neither had anyone else for that matter. She looked in at the boy whose shoulders were shaking up and down from the sharp intake of breaths. It was better to leave him alone. Heero would only be in more pain if he knew someone had seen him like this. The boy may have lost his memory, but Sally certainly wasn't going to steal his pride away.  
  
She watched the helpless soldier, hands buried his face in despair, and she realized that he needed Duo right now. She ran down the hall and found Duo sitting next to a window in an empty room.  
  
Duo was holding back his emotion to the best of his abilities. It wasn't often he felt such resistance was necessary, but if he didn't show his pain for what he thought he had lost, he wouldn't have to let go of it. Now, every moment Duo had shared with the stoic pilot, every intimate moment that was so secret had to be held by Duo, and Duo alone. It was so cold, being alone. Duo bit his lip restraining the tears that begged to be let out and kept his eyes fixed on the clouds in the distance. It was only him now as he gazed painfully at the horizon, and Sally watched as all his emotion was released in a single tear that slid down his face.  
  
Duo.  
  
***************  
  
So, what'd you think? ^-^  
  
Too much Angst at the end, do you think?  
  
Please review. Any suggestion or opinion would be very much appreciated.  
  
Thank you!!! 


	2. 1:2 Reflections

Chapter 2: Reflections  
  
  
  
Sally didn't know if now was the right time to interrupt Duo, because he looked so lost, but so was Heero, and she had this feeling that they needed each other more than ever. Sally knocked tentatively on the doorframe to the open room.  
  
Duo broke his gaze from the window and quickly came back into the world he had tried to escape from with a single tear. He wiped it away from his face and turned to see Sally standing timidly. He nodded his head to say that it was all right.  
  
"Duo, you'd better come to Heero's room. I think he's crying."  
  
"There's no way he'd cry, Sally. I think you're just imagining things." Duo looked out the window again. "Sometimes I wish he would, but that guy has killed so many people. If he wanted to cry, he would have done it a long time ago." He bit his lip, "Sorry you had to see me like this, Sal, but I'm not the perfect soldier, and you know that."  
  
"Well," Sally sighed, "when you've had some time to think about everything, I hope you'll pay Heero a visit. He's awfully upset. I'm not used to seeing him like this."  
  
Sally left Duo alone, but not for long. Duo was up and out of the room quickly enough. If it's anything Duo learned during the war, it was that emotions were less harmful when expressed briefly. If emotions were not expressed at all, then you'd be Heero, and practically no one wanted that. If emotions were expressed too much, you'd end up like Quatre, too fragile and too kind. In the war, kindness was a weakness, which is why all of them had struggled so much.  
  
Walking into Heero's room, Duo felt a twinge of sadness as he saw that the other boy looked like he had been crying. Heero wasn't as shocked as he was happy that Duo had come back. Heero was so happy, in fact, that he failed to notice that Duo's face was still stained with tears. I guess love can blind people sometimes.  
  
"Hey Heero." Duo's braid flew behind him as he grabbed a chair and ungracefully sat down on it and stared at Heero, waiting for a response. He had never seen Heero so out of it. It was like he was in a totally different world, or maybe Duo was just confused by Heero's wide-eyed expression, because it was one that he had never seen before.  
  
"Earth to Heero?" Duo smirked and Heero came to his senses.  
  
"Duo," He stared, but then looked away, "I was so sure you weren't coming back."  
  
Duo was a little shocked. Sally had said Heero looked really upset, could this have been the reason? Heero really did need him, Duo thought, not because of affection as Duo had hoped, but if only because Duo was the only person he had remembered. Didn't Heero realize that they were friends?  
  
"Heero, you don't think that I'm going to leave you now, do you? Seeing as how I got up at 6:00 this morning to see you, we'd have to be pretty damn good friends. You must be insane if you think that I'm going to leave you, now, when you need me most. I wouldn't be your best friend it I did." Duo meant every word, even though there was so much that he hadn't said.  
  
Heero smiled at this. He had a friend, now. He was so thankful. When he woke up on the hospital bed, he didn't have anything, but now he had someone who really cared about him, and Heero knew that Duo's friendship was the most valuable thing he had right now. It was a little ironic, though. Heero never could have admitted before that Duo's friendship was always the most valuable thing he ever had.  
  
"Thanks, Duo," Heero looked at him and Duo started to melt again. The former Deathscythe pilot never could understand what it was about Heero that did that to him, but he wasn't complaining, "Thanks for being my friend."  
  
"You never have to thank me, Heero. That's what a friendship is, when you do stuff for somebody without expecting anything in return."  
  
"So you'll stay?"  
  
"Hai." Duo said confidently as he watched Heero's cobalt-eyes close slowly. Heero's lips slid into a type of smile and his former partner rolled over as he drifted off into a very contented sleep.  
  
Duo kept his word and stayed with Heero all that morning as the cobalt-eyed boy slept, occasionally leaving and roaming the halls and getting into very interesting conversations with complete strangers. When it was a little past eleven, Duo went to the hospital cafeteria and got some lunch, well, it was more of a snack to the braided boy, but it would have been lunch for any normal person.  
  
He brought it back to Heero's room. Duo had also gotten something little for him because he figured Heero would be hungry when he woke up.  
  
Well, when Duo came back, Heero was still sleeping. Duo gazed lovingly at his former partner as he ate his lunch. Heero was even more adorable sleeping than ever, and Duo was very glad he had the chance to see him again. There had been so many times when Duo thought that he wouldn't ever see Heero again, but I guess fate had other plans. He loved Heero, there was no doubt about that.  
  
He guessed that fate knew. What other reason would there be for fate to keep bringing them together, of course, he could never tell Heero how he felt. The old Heero wouldn't understand, and the new Heero certainly understand. The situation was becoming more and more complicated by the minute, which is why Duo hastily went back to chewing on his lunch.  
  
Duo sighed loudly and Heero tossed uncomfortably in his sleep. Duo decided that he'd go talk to Sally. As much as he'd like to look at Heero all day, but Duo was confusing himself and growing more and more restless by the minute.  
  
"Hey Sally!" He waltzed into her office.  
  
"Hi Duo. How's Heero?" She asked, looking up from her papers for a moment before she continued rapidly scribbling. Duo collapsed in a chair.  
  
"Still sleeping. Hey, do you know when he's going to be well enough to walk?"  
  
"I don't know, Duo, it's still too early to tell, I guess. We used to think that his legs were useless. After that, the specialist doctors came in and told us he had about a year before he'd be able to use them," Sally held her hands to the air in frustration, "and from the evaluation we made today, it should only take a week or two. I swear that kid's not human!"  
  
Duo laughed, "That's Heero for you, all right!"  
  
"Duo, why don't you go home? There's nothing more that you can do here, and we'll call you when Heero's well enough to come to your house" Sally notioned, but Duo simply shook his head.  
  
"I can't leave him."  
  
"I understand." Sally watched as Duo left the room and headed back to Heero's room. She stopped her work for a minute, and saw the awkward position Duo was put in. He was forced to be Heero's protector and his friend, when both were so hard, all at once. Duo didn't know how to protect someone who had always seemed to protect him in the past, and Duo didn't know how to be someone's friend when he knew that it had become so much more to him.  
  
Sally felt pity for the braided boy, and she knew he wouldn't like others feeling sorry for either him, or Heero for that matter, but it was hard not to sympathize when everything was such a mess.  
  
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _  
  
Duo found himself waking up the next morning in an upright position on the chair he had spent all of yesterday watching Heero in. It was even weirder, though, to find that Heero had been watching him sleep.  
  
"Hello Duo. Sleep well?" Heero inquired as Duo got up to stretch his arms. Duo yawned lazily.  
  
"Yes, Hee-chan, I slept quite well. How about you? You're the one who slept all day yesterday." Duo accused and chuckled slightly.  
  
"I'm better." Heero finally decided. It was about 1:00 in the afternoon. He had woken up at around 7:30, and Sally brought him breakfast at around nine. When she saw Duo sleeping, his head cocked to one side of the chair, she laughed, and Heero begged for her not to wake him. He had been watching Duo as he slept, and although Heero could no longer see Duo's lovely violet eyes. Heero had finally decided, although it wasn't hard to figure, that Duo was just as beautiful as he slept. However, when Duo awoke, he knew that his affection for the braided boy went deeper than that. The energy and life Duo brought to the room was almost addictive. Yes, it had been a wonderful morning.  
  
"Good," Duo glanced at the clock, "Hmm, only 1:00? I thought for sure I'd sleep later than that." He grinned and winked at Heero, "NOW do you see what a big thing it was for me to wake up at 6:00 yesterday?"  
  
Heero slightly smiled back and watched as Duo blushed when his stomach made a noise.  
  
"Looks like it's time to get something to eat," Duo glanced at Heero as he was walking out the door, "Want anything Hee-chan?"  
  
"No thanks. Sally already brought me something to eat."  
  
"Okay then. I'll be right back," Duo slid through the door and out to get lunch, or breakfast. It didn't matter as long as he got something to eat.  
  
The rest of the day went pretty much the same way, with the exception of one thing. Duo had gone back to his apartment for a little while that day, of course after explaining to Heero the importance of personal hygiene and the fact that he seriously needed a change of clothes and a shower. Heero understood, of course, although the time Duo was away seemed twice as long as it actually was, for both of them.  
  
Duo got back a little late in the afternoon. Heero was reading a book Sally had given him, but he wasn't really concentrating very hard. It was so quiet around the hospital, and it was hard to concentrate when it was so quiet.  
  
All of the sudden, Heero heard the now familiar sound of Duo's shoes against the tile of the hallway, and he looked up from his book in anticipation as the braided pilot walked in the door carrying a cardboard box that made a muffled clunking sound when it landed on the night table next to Heero's bed.  
  
The chestnut-haired teenager smiled and greeted the confused cobalt eyes of the one he loved.  
  
"Hey Hee-chan! You miss me?"  
  
"Hn." He wasn't feeling very talkative, "What's in the box?"  
  
"Memories, Heero," Duo smiled meekly.  
  
"Memories? Duo, I can't," Heero bit his lip, "I can't remember anything. It would only be too painful...." Heero stopped to look up at Duo who was trying to maintain a fake smile.  
  
"You can't loose anything by trying to remember, Hee-chan." Duo reached for a photo album from inside the box. "Look here."  
  
He opened up to the first page where Heero saw himself in the middle of some kind of party, posing with a bunch of people he didn't recognize, with the exception of Duo, that is, who had one arm slung around his shoulder and was waving at the camera.  
  
"This is a picture from a party Quatre invited us all to, there," he said pointing to a young man with blond hair and smile on his face, "that's Quatre."  
  
I looked at the young blond's face. It was so happy, like Duo's....well, maybe not quite so happy, but Heero noticed his own face. It was so cold, like stone. It stood out from all the others. Was he the only one who wasn't having fun?  
  
"Quatre's one of my best friends?" I asked.  
  
"Yours and mine, pal. He's filthy rich, and we all envy him to death, but he was a Gundam pilot, too. So were Trowa and Wufei." He pointed to two other boys who were perhaps the coldest faces at the party besides his own. "I called all of them yesterday. They're coming to see you, too, Heero. They should be here at some point tomorrow."  
  
Heero knew he didn't deserve such good friends, but it was a nice thing to know that he had friends. And Duo, he hoped was more than a friend, although Heero knew he wasn't deserving of the braided beauty any more than he was deserving of friends that were willing to drop everything to come and see him.  
  
"Could you tell me about my friends, Duo?" Heero asked, at first startled by his own words, because everyone should know their own friends, but he saw Duo summon a smile and was at ease in his loving gaze.  
  
"Sure, Hee-chan." Duo said as he began to tell Heero about every person that he had ever known to the best of his knowledge, and Heero was soothed by his soft words. He was looking forward to seeing his best friends, but they didn't matter so much as long as Duo was there. Heero just wanted Duo to stay there forever.  
  
  
  
**************************************  
  
Hello *smiles*  
  
Hope you liked the second chapter!  
  
Please Review!  
  
Thanks so much!!!!! 


	3. 1:3 Old Friends

Sorry for the delay. I've been a bit busy lately, but here it is, just like I promised! Thanks for the reviews everyone! *smiles*  
  
And thanks for your support!  
  
Ok, here goes..  
  
***********************  
  
Meeting Wufei, Quatre, and Trowa at the space port wasn't the most happy of times.  
  
Duo tried to keep the conversations lighthearted because he didn't want to upset any of his friends by talking about Heero.  
  
"So, Quat, what've you been up to all this time?" Duo asked as he turned off the radio that had been blasting in the car.  
  
He only did this to make it seem a polite gesture, rather than an escape from the unspoken threat Wufei had given him if Duo didn't turn off the music, as he glared at the braided one through the backseat mirror. Man, if looks could kill!  
  
It really wasn't fair. The guy refused to sit in the back because 'only weaklings sit in the back seat', and then he had to glare at his comrades for the whole ride. Duo would have said 'injustice,' but he didn't have a death wish.  
  
"Oh, well, Duo, I took up my father's position as head of the Winner Family Corporation. You knew that, though. I've been doing quite well since then. I've missed everyone, though." Quatre looked a little timid as he said the next thing, but he knew it had to be said eventually, "How's Heero?"  
  
Duo cringed slightly at the mention of Heero. It wasn't right of him to shy away from the subject just because it was painful. Sally had called them to tell them the facts, but only Duo could tell them the details, because he knew Heero better than anyone. Years of close observation of a certain perfect soldier had left Duo as an expert. Duo knew Heero's personality down to every 'hn' and glare that ever crossed his face.  
  
"I just spent all last night talking to him about you guys. Apparently, my name is all he's remembered yet. The doctors say he'll be able to walk in a few days, now."  
  
"That's not so bad," Trowa finally spoke amidst all the silence, trying to calm the troubled thoughts that filled the empty conversation.  
  
Quatre nodded his head and went back to thinking.  
  
Wufei saw Duo's hand was sneakily heading towards the button to turn on the radio. Duo saw Wufei eyeing his braid, though, and quickly put his hand back on the steering wheel. It was good to have his friends back, even if it meant putting up with threats to his braid. None of them would ever really cut it, he didn't think, but with Wufei, you never know. Duo may have had his weak points, but he wasn't stupid. When it came to Wufei, he was sure to keep himself, well, more specifically his braid, at a safe distance. They'd just have to live without music for this car ride.  
  
"So, Duo, you're taking care of him after he leaves the hospital?" Quatre pried further. His acute observations had told him there was something more than a simple 'friend' factor between Duo and Heero, but he had never really known for sure.  
  
"Yeah, he is." Duo quickly added, "Don't worry, I cleaned. You can actually see the floor."  
  
This received a meek smile from his comrades. Duo knew this conversation was really starting to go down the drain. He would have said something else witty, except that he couldn't think of anything to say, except to say how he felt, and the silence was driving him crazy. Belt his heart out, or go insane. The choice, to Duo, wasn't all that difficult.  
  
Duo chuckled as he grieved, "Does that guy know how much it hurts me when he gets hurt? I wonder if he even cares."  
  
"Duo..." The blond pilot stared worriedly at Duo, and quickly switched from 'Feel sorry for your friends' mode and into 'Be a best friend' mode almost mechanically. It didn't matter much, though. Duo knew better than to get too emotional when he was driving and the lives of his friends were in danger, so he sucked it up and choked back whatever tears he might have shed.  
  
"I'm okay, Q-man. Just forget I said anything, k?"  
  
"But, Duo," Quatre protested, "Heero does care about you! He might not show it much, but he does! You're not only his partner; not only his partner, Duo, you're his friend! You should understand that."  
  
"No, Quatre," Duo used his full first name to add to the seriousness of his next statement. "You obviously don't get it. I WAS his friend, I WAS his partner. He couldn't give a damn about me anymore even if he wanted to. It's all gone. Can't you understand that?!"  
  
Duo's eyes did not match the sharpness of his words, and all of the pilots saw the sorrow beneath the seemed anger. He had always loved Heero without expecting anything in return, but after talking to Heero all of the night before, Duo was confused, because he loved Heero even more than he ever had, now. 'Now' was really bad timing. Heero might come to be his friend again, but it wasn't enough. Duo wanted something more, and he cursed himself for being so selfish.  
  
"Duo, I'm trying to understand, but from what I hear, how could it be possible for Heero to care for you any less then he had before?" Duo looked puzzled at Quatre's response.  
  
"What do you mean, Q?" Duo couldn't believe what Quatre had said, but the blond was more than happy to explain.  
  
"Listen, Duo. If Heero was truly your friend, as you have said he was, then it shouldn't matter that he can only remember your name. It was his choice to be your friend, Duo, and you know that Heero takes his decisions very seriously. It wouldn't be like him to change his decision. If anything, I'd think he would be even more caring for you then before." Quatre stopped when he realized what he had almost said. Quatre had almost asked Duo if he knew just how much Heero had cared for him. He blocked these words because it wasn't his place to say.  
  
Duo was deep in thought, a little surprised by how flustered his kind friend was getting over him. It was always possible the little blond knew something he didn't. It always seemed that he did. Sighing, Duo directed his attention to the road, rather than to his thoughts. He gripped the steering wheel a little tighter. It was turning into a very long ride.  
  
Silence enveloped the car, as none of them said anything else for the rest of the way. Trowa and Wufei feared they'd upset that anger by saying anything before Duo had a chance to work it out within himself, but Quatre was the wiser of them in his reasons. He had too great an understanding of his broken friend's feelings to be so foolish as to speak and upset him further. It was best allowing Duo's confusion to run its course.  
  
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _  
  
Heero tossed and turned in his sleep back at the hospital. He had been fine, the night before when he fell asleep listening to the sound of Duo's voice that echoed slightly in the awkward acoustics of the room. Now, there was nothing to keep the nightmares from coming. He was always lost in his nightmares, trying to find the answers to everything, always one step away from the key to the lock on the next door. He stood looking down an eerie hallway. There were so many doors.  
  
Duo peered into the room where Heero tossed on the bed in a deep sleep.  
  
Quatre, Wufei, and Trowa were following, and they looked into the room Duo had stopped at, but had not entered. There, sure enough, was the Heero they had always known, wild hair, lithe body, and delicate figure. They all knew, however, that Heero was much more powerful than he looked.  
  
Duo held up a finger to his lips and turned to the other pilots, motioning them to be silent as they walked into the sleeping Heero's room. Unfortunately, that didn't work. The slight tapping of shoes on the hard, hospital floor had immediately woken Heero from his restless sleep.  
  
"Duo," the mop of dark brown hair lifted itself and Heero used his arms to prop himself in an upright position, and looked from the slightly surprised, but now smiling Duo, to the other faces in the room.  
  
"I told you they were coming last night, Heero. Don't tell me you forgot." Duo looked at the enticing figure as Heero managed a smile. Priceless, Duo thought. All of Heero's emotions were priceless to him.  
  
"You look great, Heero," Quatre extended a pale hand and a smile to Heero, who accepted them both with a casual 'hn' and a handshake.  
  
"You're Quatre, right?" Heero remembered the wheaten hair and unmistakable smile from the pictures. Quatre nodded. It was quite an awkward situation.  
  
"Trowa?" Heero looked at the teenager with hair that covered half his face. Trowa nodded simply with a rare and meek smile. He didn't know what else he should do.  
  
"Wufei?" Heero turned to the greasy black hair that was attached to a scowling Wufei. The Chinese young man managed a concerned face.  
  
"The same," Wufei answered.  
  
Then there was a whole lot of silence, and it was killing Duo. It probably was best to let the silent ones be themselves, but even Quatre had joined the dark side. He loved all of his friends, but there were some things Duo wasn't willing to compromise; for example, his love of speech, freedom of speech to be specific, (and all that implies). Yes, as much as he would have loved to stand around and watch Heero all day, something had to be done.  
  
Duo marched to the other side of the room for dramatic effect as the rest watched on in inadvertent stillness. Duo had their undivided attention.  
  
"We're all finally in the same room together after over 2 years of not having seen each other. True, it took Heero's accident to get us here, but I, for one, am not going to take this day for granted."  
  
"Duo's right." Quatre chimed in. "We haven't seen each other in so long, and we can't even find anything to talk about! How about we play a game of cards?"  
  
"Blackjack!" Duo exclaimed. (Yes, games of luck were just about all he could handle.)  
  
"I was thinking more of a strategic game, Duo." Quatre replied with a sigh.  
  
"Nataku and I want to play go fish!" A black-haired boy entered the conversation, and then quickly realized everyone was staring at him, and Trowa had raised one eyebrow dangerously high "What?!"  
  
Heero watched as the room erupted in conversation. He caught snippets of what was said in the few minutes his friends were talking, but it wasn't anything he could relate to, really. He spent most of those minutes watching Duo.  
  
Heero had learned in the few days that he had 'known' Duo, that Duo had certain habits. Heero watched as they were repeated over and over, the hand gestures, the way Duo raised the pitch and held out a word he wanted to emphasize. He had become completely dependent on Duo for everything, and he didn't mind, except that he was putting the braided teenager through some trouble, and he was sorry for that.  
  
The conversation between the four friends became less when they realized the reason they were here was sitting very quietly and very patiently on the bed waiting for them to settle a bit.  
  
"Hee-chan...?" Duo ventured. The talking around him dwindled and died as the four awaited his response.  
  
"Hn," He replied.  
  
"What do you feel like doing?"  
  
Heero thought about it for a minute as he looked into Duo's eyes. What DID he feel like doing? He felt like he wanted to get up out of bed, wrap his arms around Duo, and kiss him and never let go....hey wait a second! What was he THINKING! Duo was his friend, right? His friend, but then why did he feel this way? He had no right to be thinking those things, especially since he couldn't even remember who he was. It was so selfish..he didn't even remember who Duo was. And yet, Heero felt like Duo was life itself. He was the reason that Heero looked forward to waking up the past couple of mornings, the reason why Heero waited so long for the clicking of black boots that turn into a run as they fly down the corridor.  
  
So what did Heero want to do? He wanted to remember.  
  
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ the next weekend _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _  
  
"Mr. Yuy, your progress in walking is truly extraordinary!" The doctor had just finished checking over Heero to make sure that he was in good condition.  
  
Heero was looking better than ever, and was now able to walk just fine on his own. Sally already had packed up Heero's clothes, and she needed a whole other suitcase to fit all the letters that Relena had written him in regards to his sickness. Heero, obviously not remembering the girl, took a strange disliking of her through her letters. All she did was talk about herself, anyway. Heero told Sally to burn them, but she insisted that the Heero bring them along. He resisted the urge to send a letter back simply stating 'Omae o korosu', but thought better of it. He'd had enough nightmares about killing, and he wasn't about to threaten another life, however much of a nuisance that life may have been.  
  
Quatre, Trowa, and Wufei had traveled back to their lives within a couple of days. Of course they had many interesting conversations with Heero and each other. They had gone over the old photo albums that Duo had brought up. One picture of Trowa after he'd just woken up had everyone howling in laughter. All of them had often wondered what Trowa looked like before he combed his hair that way.  
  
All in all, it was a worthwhile visit.  
  
After they left, Duo had gone back to his apartment, but he visited Heero daily, and was impatiently awaiting the day when Heero would come to live with him. He needed to show Heero about life. This was a new beginning for Heero, not an ending. Duo intended to show his friend what life was really about, and maybe get closer to him on the way. But, he wasn't going to push it. Heero needed time, and Duo respected that. But as for Heero being put under his supervision, it seemed that Duo was about to get his wish.  
  
"Mr. Yuy, you are in wonderful physical condition," the doctor concluded, "and if you promise me not to put too much strain on your legs, I think I can allow you leave of the hospital."  
  
"Hn," Heero smiled. It had been a day since he had smiled; and a day since he had seen Duo. He couldn't wait to see him again, and when that time came, they wouldn't have to say goodbye.  
  
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _  
  
"Duo, I'm so glad you're here! I've got great news!" Sally practically knocked the wind out of Duo with shock. Duo was casually walking in the hospital, carrying a gift for Heero under his right arm and was just about to round the corner on his way to Heero's room and they practically bumped into each other. Talk about surprises.  
  
"What is it Sal?" Duo asked excitedly, smile plastered on his glistening face like always.  
  
"It's Heero, the doctor says he's good to leave!"  
  
Duo's eyes widened as his smile erupted into a grin, "That's great! What does Heero think about it?" Duo's smile dimmed. He had forgotten that Heero could say no, but then again, where else would he go? Duo thought of all the times Heero had called him an idiot and various other things he didn't feel like addressing in his thoughts. Heero wouldn't possibly say yes to living with him if that was really how he felt.  
  
"What, are you kidding, that guy can't wait to see you! I'm telling you, Duo, you've got to tell him how you feel."  
  
"I'll keep that in mind," Duo said as he rushed down the hall, but fully meaning what Sally had said. He'd thought about it so many times before, but it was different, now. Duo wasn't hiding. He had tried to hide from his feelings before, in the car, but he now knew that nothing could be gained by hiding. He used to bring the veil over his eyes, as some sort of protection from the sorrow that he knew could come of confrontation, but no more. Duo Maxwell, he decided, was going to be Duo Maxwell all the way, and Heero was going to have to deal with it.  
  
Duo ran into Heero's room where Heero's bags were packed, and he was ready to go.  
  
"Duo." Heero said in his usual monotone, looking out the window to avoid eye contact. Heero was afraid of his own confrontations, but Duo's wild and free personality was going to change all of that soon enough.  
  
"Hee-chan, you're coming home with me?" Duo asked timidly, and Heero nodded, looking at Duo straight in the eye before Duo ran up to put a hand around Heero's shoulders, starting to lead him out of the room. Heero glared at Duo, and Duo laughed, touching Heero's nose gently.  
  
"You're kind of cute when you get all angry, Hee-chan, but when you're in my apartment, you go by my rules, and that means no glaring, okay?"  
  
*glare*  
  
"Okay, okay! You can glare." Duo took his arm off Heero and crossed his arms kind of teasingly with a kind of lively spark in his eyes. Heero didn't know exactly what that was for, but it was making him go weak at the knees.  
  
"But if you're allowed to glare, that means that you also have to smile, Hee-chan."  
  
Heero looked at Duo curiously, and it took all of Duo's self control to laugh instead of kissing Heero. Duo couldn't help his longing, Heero just looked so adorable when he gave Duo that look, and it was something Heero had never done to the best of Duo's knowledge before he lost his memory.  
  
There was no more reason to hide, Duo thought to himself as he led Heero out to the car, entertaining with some idle conversation.  
  
There was no more reason for Heero to be afraid of showing who he really was. No, there never was a reason, but the fear was always there. The fear had left with Heero's memory, and it seemed he would never have reason to be afraid any longer.  
  
Duo waved goodbye to Sally at the door of the hospital, and pulled out of the parking lot with his car, and with Heero. They were going home, and there was every reason in the world to show Heero how life how life was supposed to be lived, and hopefully, to teach him how to love life, like Heero had never done before.  
  
Duo already knew how to live his life, but more importantly how to love it. And Duo should know, after all, he was in love, and that's all he needed to know.  
  
TBC.  
  
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _  
  
Well? Did you like it?  
  
It's a transition chapter, but I hope it went well.  
  
Please Review.  
  
Thanks so much!!!!!!! 


	4. 1:4 Going Home

*smiles and waves at you enthusiastically* Here's my response to your reviews..from all the chapters so far. You are all so nice to me!  
  
Eternal-Sleeper: Thanks for coming back and reviewing. Hmmm.It could be funny if Heero hit his head and got his memory back. Heero's probably going to end up remembering too, because I've got this weakness for happy endings. The humor might serve to take off some of the weight of the emotional situation of Heero's recovery when the time comes, which might be good, so thanks for the suggestion. I'll keep it in mind. I know that this story idea is pretty unoriginal, as you mentioned, but I really think this is a great way for Heero to actually admit his feelings, and I'm trying hard to make it my own.  
  
Diane: Thanks for putting so much time and thought into your reviews. I'm glad that you liked that I added Relena. I had trouble deciding weather or not I should mention her, and finally convinced myself that her presence in the story could only reinforce the feelings between Duo and Heero. I'm happy you like the monologues; and emotions are about to become stronger still, so it won't be long before I let them surface.  
  
Tigerlily26, Spirit Sylph, Soul Sister, Amber Inuyasha, Eve, Kuso chan, and lillie chan: Thanks so much for reviewing! I'm really glad you liked this story so much so far! I hope that you find this new chapter just as enjoyable.  
  
Fei: Not too much angst? Yea! *claps hands happily* I like to torture Duo and Heero that way. Makes for a better story, or at least I think so. Beware for further torment, but not too much, of course. Duo and Heero are always comforted by their unspoken affections, so it's balanced.  
  
Cobalt Kitty: I totally agree! I love that sensitive side to Heero that barely anyone sees. When Heero can't remember, he can't remember to pretend to be insensitive...right? Oh, great, now I've gone and confused myself again.  
  
OK, so now that I'm all confused, I am going back to the story. However, I must first state a little disclaimer for this story, which I had forgotten up to this point. Why anyone would sue me, I don't know. I thought it was pretty obvious that I don't own Gundam Wing, I own nothing, and I don't make any money with anything I write here. It's just my fun. There, I said it, now back to the story.  
  
***************************** Going Home:  
  
Duo couldn't believe that Heero Yuy was actually going to be living in his apartment. Sure, they had been roommates before, but this was just a little bit different. Duo didn't have any clue how long Heero was going to stay with him, but he didn't much care. I mean, it's hard to take sides in his position. Duo wanted Heero's memory to come back, but then Heero would have to leave him again, because he does have a life. Sally contacted and cancelled all of Heero's pre-organized appointments for a whole year; expecting the worst. Duo smiled as they walked inside the apartment building, as if he was seeing an old friend. Duo lived in a 20-story apartment building in a city, and it seemed to suit him just fine. The doorman, or rather door-woman opened the door for them.  
  
"Hey Francine! How're the kids!" Duo gladly greeted the woman who he seemed to have made friends with. It's hard being around Duo and not becoming friends with him.  
  
"Just fine, Mr. Maxwell, thank you." Duo's eyes rolled at the way the she addressed him. She had been calling him that forever; and Francine just smiled, because Duo was always the same. It was hard to find a resident in the hotel who was as kind as he was. She saw Duo say something to his friend and go bouncing off to get the mail in the adjacent room and then she eyed Heero. He must have been the most perfect guy she had seen in a long time. Heero was wearing some clothes that Duo had brought him, because Heero had complained that the spandex was uncomfortable..go figure. Anyway, they looked really good; which is the exact reason Duo had given them to him, because it made him drool every time he looked in Heero's direction. Not necessarily a good thing, but damn, he looked hot!  
  
"So, Duo, is this your new boyfriend?" She said as the braided one almost dropped his armful of mail in surprise. Well, he wasn't so much in shock as Heero was, but then again, Heero didn't have anything to drop, except perhaps a jaw, which was good enough at the time.  
  
"Francine, meet Heero, my FRIEND. He's going to be staying with me for a while, as a FRIEND, so I'm going to go take my FRIEND up to my apartment now so that we can do whatever it is FRIENDS do." Duo stuck his tongue out at Francine, who just smiled.  
  
"Sorry, I was going to say that you have good taste. He's really hot, you know." Duo glared at her, yeah, as if he didn't know...  
  
Heero was merely staying out of their way at the time, because he was too busy thinking about him and Duo. Duo hadn't really told him too much about their relationship as 'friends' so he said. Heero was wondering if there had been something else before then, now that he knew Duo felt the same way as he did about guys. Perhaps Duo was simply testing him, to see if his affections for Duo would survive through loss of memory.  
  
As Heero was finishing his thoughts, with the conclusion that it wasn't a good idea to jump to conclusions, Duo was practically dragging Heero away by his arm, making faces at Francine as they walked into the elevator.  
  
"Duo, you 'doth protest too much, methinks.'" Francine yelled into the closing doors of the elevator.  
  
"Well 'methinks' you should stop quoting Shakespeare and mind your own business." Duo stuck his tongue out a second time, and Francine laughed full-heartedly as the elevator door closed shut. The manager walked into the room and took his place at the computer desk near the front doors, watching his door-woman laughing so hard she was clutching her stomach.  
  
"What's so funny that you decided it was more important than your work?" He stated quite matter-of-factly as she made her way back to greeting the residents.  
  
"Just some great guy who won't admit he's in love."  
  
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _  
  
"Well, here we are, Hee-chan," Duo turned the key to the apartment and opened the door, letting his guest in first. "It's not much, but at least it's clean. Don't get used to it, though. I'm just about the messiest person ever; you've been warned."  
  
"Hn," Heero looked around. It was a fairly small apartment, but enough space to call a home. There was a bathroom, a living room, a kitchen, and a master bedroom. Duo had told him earlier that the couch in the living room was convertible into a bed, which was very convenient considering the circumstances, but Heero had assumed he would be sleeping there.  
  
"Of course," Duo said as he collapsed on a chair in the living room, and motioned Heero to do the same, "you'll be sleeping in my bed, for now. You're injuries are still healing, you know, and I refuse to put them through any more strain until they're all better, which means you must be comfortable."  
  
"I'll be fine on the couch, Duo, really. I don't want to impose on you any more than I already have." Heero shook his head in rejection, and Duo, knowing the perfect soldier better than most anyone, knew exactly how to make him take the bed without question.  
  
"But you would be going against my wishes if you did not. You are not imposing yourself on me Hee-chan. If I didn't want you here, you'd better be sure as hell that I'd have kicked you out already." Duo put his hands behind his head, admiring Heero's features. "Yeah, you're pretty much stuck with me."  
  
"Hn," Heero reluctantly agreed, or at least it sounded like an agreement to Duo. It was sometimes kind of hard to tell between the different 'Hn's. However, Duo had gotten fairly good at 'Hn' identification, and although this was a characteristic of the perfect soldier, Duo still felt the need to expand Heero's vocabulary. It would have to wait till later, though, this didn't seem like the right time to bring up the topic. Heero looked deep in thought as he stared into Duo's eyes. Duo had no idea what Heero was trying to find in there, because he was too busy trying hard not to look directly back, because his leather pants were beginning to feel just a little tighter than usual. "Sally said that she sent over my things." The pensive gaze was broken into a soft, questioning one, and Duo quickly remembered about the laptop he threw away. Good thing he forgot to take out the trash, because he wasn't about to lie to anyone, especially not to Heero.  
  
"Yeah, she did," Duo got up off the chair and quickly retrieved the laptop from the garbage in his room, and handed it to a face with one eyebrow raised in a very cute fashion, and this made Duo thank God it was dark enough in the room so Heero couldn't see his own face flushing red. It wasn't that Duo was embarrassed, just that Heero made him feel things that no one else ever made him feel, and it was so awkward that Duo couldn't help but blush.  
  
"This is all?" Heero said, after he examined the piece of equipment with his eyes. Duo nodded, still hesitant from words, for fear they might come out a little hoarse, because of the lump that still sat in his throat.  
  
Heero was too busy turning on the computer and trying to remember something, that he forgot about Duo, who felt like his heart was sinking into his stomach as he sat conservatively on the couch, trying in vain to pull himself together.  
  
He's lost his memory, Duo told himself. It would be taking advantage of him if you told him how you feel, but you have to yourself together! You are not going to sit like this, a lump of mashed potatoes, a lump of COLD mashed potatoes..mmm, potato chips..focus! You're not helping anyone by feeling sorry for yourself. Here you are, in your apartment, with the most beautiful guy you've ever seen in your entire life, and you're falling apart. This is love, not hide-and-seek. Don't make him find you; not again.  
  
Heero was looking around his laptop for something that he wrote, something he could look at, anything that might bring some sort of memory back, but everything was safe-locked by advanced technology, and everything needed a password. Heero had instinctively tried to hack into his files, but the defenses were too strong, even for him.  
  
"Duo," The stoic boy ventured helplessly, breaking the braided one from his trance of thought, which left even the thinker baffled.  
  
"Yeah, Hee-chan?" Duo cheerfully replied. For one who never tells a lie, he was damn good at hiding his torment.  
  
"I can't seem to hack into any of my files, and for obvious reasons, I can't remember the passwords. I didn't happen to tell you any, did I?" Duo grinned mischievously at this.  
  
"You might not have told me any of your passwords, but I sure have gotten good at getting into your files. The first ones are pretty hard, but possible, see?" Duo typed in a couple of commands, decoding the password, and from there, easily gained access to the perfect soldier's mission files.  
  
"But these," Duo pointed at the bottom of the page where there were several tabs, "I've never been able to get into these ones, no matter how hard I tried. I think you knew I could get into the others, which is why you made them so easy to get into. They aren't important, except they were to OZ, and you made it just so no one in OZ would be able to get into them. The others probably have some personal stuff about you that you didn't want anyone to know. You were very secretive, you know that?" Duo finished his explanation in hopes of some kind of remembrance, and Heero shrugged nonchalantly.  
  
"I don't know. Am I still secretive?" The perfect soldier asked. Duo was taken aback by the question.  
  
"Depends on if you're hiding any secrets, Hee-chan. I'm going to make dinner, okay?" He answered with a smile.  
  
Heero simply sat on the chair in silence as he heard Duo turn on a CD player in the kitchen. Heero felt horrible, because he was hiding a secret, but he didn't want to be secretive. He wanted to be different than this person Duo thought he was, because as much as he wished he could be this person, he couldn't.  
  
Heero was tired of people telling him how he used to be. He was a new person now, couldn't they see that? He was not Heero Yuy; just a boy they thought was Heero Yuy, nothing more, and he hated himself for deceiving Duo like that. Heero felt like he didn't deserve all of this attention. He knew he wasn't who they thought he was, because without the memories, he was nothing.  
  
If only he knew how wrong he was.  
  
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _  
  
Heero was reading through the files on his laptop, when he heard dishes being placed on the table. It must be just about time to eat.  
  
The music Duo had been listening to was really annoying to the perfect soldier, but of course he wouldn't say anything. Duo, of course, also knew how much Heero hated listening to his music, and would occasionally peek into the living room to see how he was fairing. Heero usually had a scowl on, to so his discontent, and even once had his hands around his ears. Duo was pleased that Heero hadn't changed, but even more pleased that Heero had, if that makes any sense at all. You see, the old Heero would have marched into the kitchen, yelled 'Baka,' turn off the music, and glare threateningly. Oh well, Heero would just have to warm up to Duo a little bit more before he would be so bold as to come in to disturb the braided boy's habit.  
  
Heero came into the room as he heard the plates clash with the table, and came to find Duo, fork in hand, using it as a microphone as he walked over to the dishwasher, mouthing the words to the song. Duo didn't realize Heero was there, and as Duo bent over to grab some serving spoons out of the open dishwasher full of clean dishes, Heero found himself staring at a very cute picture.  
  
That was when Duo noticed he was there.  
  
"Hee-chan!" Duo turned his head around cheerfully and watched the Asian's face turn eight shades of red, as Duo realized what it was exactly that Heero had been watching. He grinned even wider.  
  
"I made spaghetti! Aren't you proud of me?" Duo motioned, because it truly had been a miracle he was able to cook anything at all, but after the war ended, he had to figure out something that he could make without burning it, mutilating it, or nearly setting the building on fire in an attempt to make it. Spaghetti seemed to be the perfect solution.  
  
"Hn," Heero said. It was about all he could handle since he was still calming himself about the incident a few minutes earlier. He was glad that Duo didn't seem angry at all, but there was a slight chance that he didn't notice. No, Heero thought as he watched his braided friend skip around the kitchen occasionally sneaking a glance and a smile at him. Duo noticed.  
  
"Take as much as you want, Hee-chan, there's plenty here, and you need your strength, besides." Duo took the fork he had earlier been using as a microphone and threw it on top of a napkin and slid it across the table to Heero.  
  
They began eating in silence, mostly because Heero was idly fiddling with the spaghetti, still too embarrassed to do anything, and Duo was busy stuffing his face happily. He couldn't believe that Heero was actually admiring him that way; but Duo wasn't complaining, no, on the contrary, he was inspired.  
  
All that afternoon, Duo made a conscious effort to be seductive with the Asian, the tease that he was. For instance, when he saw Heero making a reach for the spaghetti, he reached faster, and their hands ended up touching, and Heero ended up blushing, and they had an argument over who was able to serve themselves first, of course each one refusing to serve themselves. Duo ended up serving himself, saying the argument was silly, and of course, he was right, but he served himself painfully slow, so that Heero was forced to watch him, as Duo never broke eye contact.  
  
They adjourned to the living room, where Duo was munching on donuts as he continued reading 'Romeo and Juliet'. Duo loved to read Shakespeare, not because of the old language, or because the works are known among the greatest of all time, but because, as everyone who understands Shakespeare knows, it's really dirty stuff! I mean, if the general public could actually understand what they were saying in there, it would probably be rated R. Well, Duo understood it just fine, and that's why he read them, laughing hysterically when Mercutio had a line about..well, you really don't want to know.  
  
Heero, on the other hand, was trying in vain to hack into his own personal files. He was getting closer, though, he could feel it. Heero also realized that whatever he had in there must have been really private if it was so protected, which only made him all the more curious.  
  
"So Heero, ready to hit the sack?" The braided one lifted himself off the chair lazily and stretched his arms, along with his book, high above his head, yawning loudly as he brought them back down.  
  
Heero sat there, his back facing Duo, glued to the computer. He wasn't typing anymore, and he didn't even utter a response. Duo lifted his watch to his eyes, and brought it back out to focus, disbelieving what it said.  
  
"Hee-chan! It's 3:00 am! You're going to bed if I have to drag you away from that thing, just like old times. Well, not exactly like old times, because if it were, you would have thrown me halfway across the room had I so much as touched your arm with intent to bring you to bed; you were so damn stubborn." Duo rambled as he noticed the perfect soldier wasn't responding. He must have been pretty angry at that, not having responded, and Duo was a little concerned. He didn't mean to upset Heero.  
  
"Hee-chan, I.I.you're..well, I didn't mean it like that. You know I didn't." Duo started to use arm gestures, even though Heero didn't even turn to see them.  
  
"The truth is, Heero, that I like you. I like you a lot." Duo looked at the perfect soldier's back, the tears just barely coming out of his eyes when there wasn't a response. He expected Heero to storm out of the room in anger and leave the next morning for Quatre's estate. Instead there was nothing. Duo approached the computer gently, as a last plea, when he heard something strange.  
  
Duo rushed around to Heero's side as Heero snored a second time, closed eyes and all. Duo sighed in relief, but partly in sadness. He almost wished Heero had heard, but it was probably better that he never would. Better for both of them, he thought as turned off the computer, and picked up the sleeping Heero. He was actually lighter than he looked, and Duo placed him on his bed, and pulled the covers over the perfect soldier, who was in the perfect picture, and placed a light kiss on his forehead.  
  
Heero pulled the covers tighter around his small figure, and Duo admired how adorable he was. Just like a little kid, but weren't they both, now. Neither of them had ever had a childhood; I guess they were just catching up on lost time. Still, Duo felt the need to stay by the boy as he slept.  
  
Maybe it was all the nights he slept by Heero in the hospital, or maybe it was how helpless Heero looked lying there sound asleep, with only the covers to protect him. Either way, Duo grabbed his desk chair and a pillow from the couch, and made himself comfortable.  
  
After all, he would be staying the night.  
  
************************************ *smiles*  
  
How was it???? Please?!?!?  
  
I love reviews!!!!  
  
I would be very grateful for comments and suggestions.  
  
Thanks!!!!! 


	5. 1:5 Finding Out

I don't own anything, so please don't sue me. I am a loyal fan of Gundam Wing, though, who likes to make up stuff and torture the characters; hence the word 'fanfiction'.  
  
*************Responses to Revered Reveiwers (alliteration.hehe) ***************  
  
Phoenix: It's not just you, I like picking on Wufei. I don't hate him, quite the opposite. However, he IS my comic relief, so it seemed right that I exaggerate his self-indulgent side, but I did go a little overboard this time. I like Wufei, really, I do, but this fic was turning out so serious, I couldn't stand it. Wufei was the perfect little pawn. Sorry you didn't think it was funny; I tried. *shrugs* I never really thought about the possibility of selective amnesia with Heero, where the trauma finally got to him, but in the case, for the sake of not-having-thought-of-that-before, he remains being a true amnesiac. Thanks for the thought, though!  
  
Lillie chan: Yea! My foreshadowing works! *checks off on lists of things to improve on and waves clipboard in the air happily*. Thanks so much for reviewing! You've made me so happy! Hope your predictions are correct, or else I'm back to the old drawing board *sigh*.  
  
Eternal-Sleeper: I thought it would be interesting to have Heero snoring. I can imagine it, too. He just seems like the kind of person who would snore, if only so that it would be funny that he didn't know about it, don't you think?  
  
Fei: lol. Of course there will be a happy ending. I love happy endings, and especially after really sad things. You're headed in the right direction of thinking with the Heero reading something on his laptop. I meant that to be foreshadowing, and I'm really glad it worked! I'm definitely going to keep with this story, although I don't know if it's going to turn out as tormenting as I thought. Thanks for your support. *smiles*  
  
Kat: I just love Heero and Duo's personalities. They're so fun to write, especially when they're around each other, because they seem like complete opposites, but the more I write about them, the more I realize how little their differences are. Just a little food for thought, is all. Glad you like the story!  
  
*********************************  
  
Heero woke up with a jolt to the sound of construction outside the open window in Duo's room. The cool air from the wind outside was refreshing, and Heero quickly realized where he was, in Duo's bed. He realized that he must have fallen asleep in front of the computer the night before, and then Duo must have carried him into the room. Heero became very happy that Duo had been considerate enough to bring him to bed, but at the same time, cursed himself for not being awake. Heero had once again managed to put Duo through more trouble, but Heero smiled at the thought of Duo carrying him into the room. He would have given anything to be have been awake, with Duo's arms around him. The thought of it made him shiver with lust, but he quickly shook that off along with the covers as he got out of large, black bed.  
  
Heero realized that he was still wearing the clothes he wore the day before. That made sense, he thought, and then unconsciously blushed at the alternative. It would have been really awkward to wake up and find himself in nightclothes.  
  
It was very hard not to notice all the posters of rock bands and other pictures of people all over the American's bedroom walls. The floor was clean, but Heero quickly remembered Duo telling him about the rarity of this circumstance. An ordinary digital clock on the night table read 11:00, and Heero noticed Duo's bookcase across the room. It was filled with all sorts of magazines and odd papers, with the occasional great work of literature. It made him wonder at the two different sides of Duo's personality.  
  
Heero walked hesitantly into the next room, accompanied only by the sounds of construction through the open window to the outside. He looked on the couch, where Duo was sprawled over, not even having bothered to pull it out into a bed. Duo was open-mouthed and drooling onto the pillow, with a book laid across his chest that he clutched gently in his right hand. His braid dangled over the armrest as Duo shifted in his sleep, but the American was completely unmoved by the noisy construction outside.  
  
Heero learned very quickly in living with Duo that he didn't wake up until he was ready, and that could take hours. That's not to say, of course, that Heero ever wanted Duo to wake up. He was growing fonder of the American every minute, and the adorable picture would have been a sin to disturb.  
  
Looking around the apartment, Heero decided that the best way to spend his morning was to show his appreciation by pulling his weight around the house, but what to do?  
  
He first looked to the kitchen, where making breakfast would be a good idea if he could remember a good recipe. Heero thought he might give it a try. Looking through the cabinets for ingredients for pancakes, he found many interesting things. Who knew that Duo could keep so many things in the kitchen that were of absolutely no nutritional value? Heero even found a large, half empty container of shampoo. He put it on the counter where Duo would be able to find it, but he wasn't going to ask.  
  
Just then, he heard a bit of rustling in the living room followed by a loud yawn, and Heero peeked his head around the doorframe to find a disheveled Duo bringing his arms down from above his head as he finished the yawn, and stopping to widen, and then rub his eyes disbelieving at the sight of Heero.  
  
A smirk crossed Duo's face as the events of the day before flooded into his mind, and he collapsed dramatically onto the couch with a groan, watching Heero's eyebrows raise slightly at the action.  
  
"I never wake up this early," Duo whined, smiling as lay on the couch, putting the back of his hand over his eyes for dramatic effect, expecting some sort of sympathy from the Asian who was feeling guilty.  
  
"I'm sorry, did I wake you?" Heero stepped into the living room, where a smiling Duo bolted to an upright position and grinned. Heero was annoyed that he was so easily tricked and glared. It was a reflex, but it only encouraged Duo, because repetition had caused the threatening action to be anything but threatening. Duo was living proof of that, of course.  
  
"No, Hee-chan, you didn't wake me, but what are YOU doing up so early?"  
  
"Duo, it's really not early."  
  
"Yeah, I suppose it's not for you, but we did go to sleep at 3, well, uh..." Duo chuckled a little, "I don't know exactly when you went to sleep, but it was before 3." Duo looked up, hopeful of something from the Asian besides the trademark glare. No such luck. Duo sighed in defeat.  
  
"So, what are you doing in the kitchen?" Duo asked, and Heero shrugged. He didn't get anything done, except find a bottle or two of shampoo. There wasn't reason to mention anything else.  
  
Duo watched as the dark mop of hair went back to the laptop. Just like old times, right? No. Duo had been trying to fool himself into believing that this was just him and Heero on another mission, but it wasn't. He was living in the past, and Heero still felt so lost, trying to block his feelings from his mind, and he was damn good at it, too. After all, wasn't that what Heero had done all through the war. Heero had finally lost himself, and needed to face his helplessness, but stubborn as ever, he refused to ask for any help.  
  
"Hey, Hee-chan?" Duo leaned against the counter and looked at the handsome face that refused to stray from the laptop screen, and edged closer.  
  
"Yes, Duo." The monotone voice continued typing as Duo pulled up a chair and looked-on.  
  
"You wanna talk?" Duo asked thoughtfully with a hopeful smile, "I know that something's on your mind."  
  
"I don't know what there is to say." Heero bit his lip and continued typing, as Duo tugged his chair just a little closer, close enough so that Heero could feel Duo's breath on his cheek. It made Heero shiver slightly to know that Duo was so close, but he refused to look straight into the beautiful lavender eyes that Heero knew were staring straight at him in concern.  
  
"I..I don't need your pity." Heero stuttered, swallowing gratefully as he felt Duo's presence move farther away. The words stung.  
  
"I suppose not, but you do need my help." Duo answered bitterly. He didn't know how else to get through to Heero. Duo began to leave, knowing that he had won this round, and it just needed to sink in, before Heero was able to face the facts. He had already shown Heero pictures and things, which did nothing. He had shown Heero friendship with Quatre, Trowa, and Wufei, and still nothing. Could the answer be love?  
  
"Wait, Duo," Heero stood up from his chair in fear that Duo would leave him all alone. Duo turned around, surprised. Heero had never asked him to stay before, not in all the years they had known each other. Maybe Heero wasn't the perfect soldier after all.  
  
"You said you wouldn't leave. In the hospital, remember?"  
  
"Yeah, Hee-chan. I remember," Duo came and sat down once again as Heero did. Duo pushed the laptop aside, so there wasn't any distraction. Cobalt eyes looked at the hands that were fidgeting in his lap. He really was a nervous wreck, not just because of Duo, and the way his beauty made him weak at the knees, but because of everything. Just, everything, he thought as he felt and saw a warm hand come over his own in a comforting way. Heero looked up, shocked to see Duo was still looking at him. It was just another one of Duo's tricks, as Duo smirked. Heero had finally looked at him straight in the eyes and was lost again in them. The feeling was mutual.  
  
"Hey, why don't we go grab breakfast somewhere," Duo asked hopefully, breaking the awkward silence. Heero came out of the trance and blinked, looking elsewhere, anywhere else, "Unless you want to cook, or you want spaghetti, that is." Duo broke into laughter and let go of Heero's hand when Heero forced a smile to show that he agreed with Duo's suggestion.  
  
"Come on, buddy," Duo quickly rummaged through a bunch of items on the counter for keys and a wallet and headed for the door.  
  
"Umm, Duo..?" Heero ventured, noticing Duo's disheveled appearance, mostly referring to the stray strands of chestnut hair protruding from the braided confinement, and Heero didn't take the time to look in the mirror that morning, but he took it that he didn't look too great either. Duo looked questioningly at Heero for a moment, seeing as his sentence hadn't been finished, but quickly realized what Heero was talking about.  
  
"Oh!" He exclaimed with a unconcerned wave of his hand, turning back to opening the door, "they won't care about how we look where we're going. They're used to seeing me like this, especially on weekday mornings." He smiled.  
  
"Duo, it's not morning anymore," the expressionless one raised an eyebrow at Duo again, as the braided one chuckled yet again, letting his friend through the doorway first, like a gentleman, which was almost laughable in itself. By the expressions of the two during this whole thing, an onlooker would have seen their actions as flirting, but neither of them realized.  
  
It was a really shame that they didn't notice the laptop was still on in the room, because it had been the answer all along.  
  
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _  
  
The sidewalks weren't very busy where Duo lived, because it wasn't in the center of the city, but it was a nice little block. Duo was making useless conversation about various buildings and people he knew who lived in them. Heero made the observation that Duo loved people and loved being around people, but he somehow could sense that Duo was very lonely, and that however happy Duo might have looked, it was mostly a type of façade to hide. Funny, Heero thought to himself, they weren't so different as he thought. They were best friends, Duo had said so in the hospital, then why did he feel so distant? Heero knew it was because he wanted something that he knew he couldn't have.  
  
"Here it is." Duo pointed to a small place, " It's a family business; that's why I come here. They're really hard to find these days. Nice people, too."  
  
Heero was still looking around at the city before him, amazed, and not really listening to what Duo was saying, so he was kind of surprised when he felt himself being dragged into the building with one arm by an excited Duo, who let go after one glare, because he hadn't the time to argue, he was too busy waving to the lady behind the counter, who seemed really busy, but so was the whole restaurant, for that matter. She had a phone on one shoulder, was holding dirty dishes in her left hand, and shouting to someone in the kitchen something about scrambled eggs. She saw Duo and smiled and answered with a quick wave before throwing a tantrum at the person on the other end of the phone line, hanging up with the last word and a sigh of relief.  
  
It was in this moment of peace that the braided one chose to intervene.  
  
"Terry! How've you been?" Duo bounded up, and dark blue eyes looked up in the annoyance of an older sister who doesn't have time to talk to her little brother.  
  
"Same as I have been for the past week! What a day!" The overworked, older teen slammed the dishes down and ran her fingers through her hair in a frustrated fashion, and looked up at a still smiling Duo, "Where have you been anyway? And who's your friend?"  
  
"This is Heero. He doesn't talk much." Duo looked at Heero, who wasn't all that thrilled about other people talking about him behind his back, right in front of his face, but Heero didn't have the chance to even glare, his breath was taken away by sparkling lavender eyes, which, of course, was noticeable to everyone in the diner except Duo. Terry sighed and shook her head as she watched Duo dragging Heero to his favorite table by the window, which they had to add a second chair to. She didn't leave much time for them to order, because time was money, and she already knew Duo's order.  
  
"So, what'll it be today?" She looked at cobalt blue eyes that shied underneath dark brown bangs, and Duo decided to pipe in.  
  
"I'll have a...."  
  
"Duo, I already know what you want. Coffee, toast, and scrambled eggs," She turned back to Heero, unaware of the playful smile creeping over Duo's lips.  
  
"I'll have whatever Heero's having." Duo announced cheerily, as he put his arms behind his head in a relaxed position, smiling contently. Both of the listeners slowly turned around with the face that said what-planet-are-you- from-anyway, only to find a pleased smirk on a pleased smirk on the American's face.  
  
"Oookkaaayy," Terry looked back at Heero, "What will you both be having today?"  
  
Heero hesitated as he looked at Duo, who would undoubtedly get the last laugh unless he did something, "Coffee, toast and scrambled eggs."  
  
Duo jolted up from his shattered victory to find Terry unsuccessfully containing a chuckle, and a smirking Heero across from him. Duo, instead of throwing up his hands in disgust, or saying something rude, just sat there, very surprised. It seemed that Heero did have a personality, after all.  
  
"Well for someone who doesn't talk too much, Duo, your friend sure knows how to strike up a breakfast conversation, and make things easy on the waitress," Terry smiled as she took the menus away and nudged Heero on the shoulder and said, hand cupped in a whisper that was only meant for his ears, "Hey, kid, take my word for it, Duo's a great guy. I've been his friend for a while, and he really likes you. I can tell." Terry winked and walked away, laughing openly at the protest following her from the table.  
  
"You come back here, Terry!" Duo stood up and yelled so that he made sure she heard, "What the hell did you tell Heero?! He won't tell me, he just keeps smirking and..Terry!!?"  
  
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _  
  
They came back from the diner in early afternoon. Heero had been thinking about what Duo's friend had said. Could it really be true? All through breakfast, lunch, or brunch, whichever you prefer to call it, Heero had been watching Duo, as someone from the outside would picture him. Duo partook in strange habits, like fiddling with the loose bits from his braid, and even though Duo spent the whole time talking to him, he rarely ever looked at him THAT way, well, at least not when he was paying attention. A few times when Heero was drinking his coffee, he absent- mindedly took to looking out the window. It was then that Heero noticed Duo looking different than usual. Heero had noticed this before, but maybe it was just because it was how Duo always had been around him, and not because it was a personality trait. Wishful thinking, of course, he realized. He didn't deserve Duo's affections any more than he deserved to be the one surviving that plane crash, and yet, he was still living, so just maybe..  
  
"Whatcha doin' for so long on that thing anyways?" Duo rested a lazy arm across the back of the chair, where the Asian had been for the past few hours, but of course it was just another way of getting a little closer to Heero. He was really doing his best to drop all sorts of hints, but everything was being thrown right back at him. Heero was so oblivious and stubborn, and was so cute that way, too, but it could get aggravating at times. Duo knew he shouldn't push it, but it was so hard.  
  
Duo inched closer till his arm was actually laying lazily on Heero's shoulders, and not his chair. Heero felt himself blushing yet again, but why? Why did Duo make him feel so good? It wasn't fair to Duo, because he didn't know him well enough, damn, he didn't know himself well enough to commit to any kind of feeling.  
  
"I'm just trying to hack into my own files." Yeah, that did sound pretty funny, when Heero thought about it. Apparently Duo thought so to, judging by the smile, but Duo was always smiling, wasn't he? Heero didn't know Duo well enough to tell.  
  
"Well, I'm going to take a shower," Duo said, and to cure the puzzled look that grew on Heero's face, he added, "It takes me a while to shower, you know, the hair."  
  
"Hn." Heero answered, almost as if in agreement, and continued typing, and Duo headed out of the room, making hand gestures to the wall ahead.  
  
"Geez. I wasn't asking your permission, or anything. I just wanted to warn you before disappearing for two hours."  
  
"Baka."  
  
"I heard that." Duo smiled as he closed the bathroom door behind him.  
  
Heero quickly went back to work on his laptop. The perfect soldier may have forgotten who he was, but the imprints that J and his teachings had on him were pretty much permanent, as well as Heero's natural instinct for hacking. He was sure of what to do.  
  
An hour or so later, Heero heard the water to the shower turn off and rolled his eyes, although he hadn't spent his time any better than Duo had. Practically nothing had come of an hour's work. It only made Heero think of how good at computers he must have been before, or of how much he didn't want anyone to see these files. It was very awkward. There was really only one other solution that he could think of that was left, and it actually looked like it was going to work this time.  
  
After a minute's typing and deliberation, a popup came onto the screen.  
  
'Access granted'  
  
Heero opened up the file eagerly and found a kind of diary, each entry signed with his name, of course. He began with the first one, and his eyes widened with surprise at what he found. Of course, it explained his coming to earth and his first mission, but it also mentioned something he hadn't been expecting, but that he was actually happy to find.  
  
'.I met a beautiful pilot about a week ago with lavender eyes and a smile that brightens my day every time I see it. I found out today that his name is Duo Maxwell, and I think that I love him..'  
  
Meanwhile, in the next part of the apartment, Duo had just finished dressing and braiding his hair. He had put on particularly tight clothes that day, in hopes that Heero might notice him, and stopped to admire himself in the mirror for a moment before coming out into the living room, where Heero sat bewildered in front of the laptop, and easily snuck up behind the Asian's back to take a look at what had left his object of affection so stupefied.  
  
It would change both their worlds for him to find out....  
  
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _  
  
Yea! Cliffhanger!  
  
Don't hurt me *shields self with hands from all small low-flying objects*  
  
Please Review! Thanks! 


	6. 1:6 Found

Responses to Revered Reviewers for Chapter 5:  
  
Diane: Thanks so much for your review! It was really thoughtful. You understand so well what I'm trying to say! Your analysis of Heero as I am hoping to portray him in this story is absolutely correct! As for Duo, I've always thought of him as the kind of person who would let people believe less of him in the hopes of hiding his true self. And although everyone else might be fooled, Heero isn't *smiles*. I'm very glad that you liked the breakfast scene. It's one of my better ideas, I think. Also, you hit the nail on the head (figuratively speaking) when you mentioned Heero's idea that he is a 'burden' becoming a problem. To answer your last question, you'll have to read this chapter ^-^ But I can say, now, that it's hard to 'chase' someone when they're not running away. Thanks so much for your perceptive review!!  
  
Tigerlily26: I'm really, really, REALLY sorry for leaving it off there, but when I came to the part it was already seven pages long, and I just couldn't resist that cliffhanger. You know; the power of the pen, the desire of evil. It's one in the same. Anyhoo, hope your nerves are cured by this next fluffy chapter. And, just so you know, my weakness is a happy ending. Heero and Duo are soul-mates, at the very least, and *waves 1+2 flag* must be together! I only write angst so the end product will be all the more dramatic.  
  
The Lone Writer: I'm so glad you like it!! Thanks so much for writing a review. I found your story from your review, so it's kind of ironic that you didn't know I wrote this. Keep up the great writing! You don't have to worry about me giving up on this fic, even though this is the last chapter to the first part. I'm way too attached to stop now! *smiles*  
  
Samptra: I think that your friend is a little violent, there. You okay? (lol) Glad you like the story, and sorry I wasn't so fast in writing this. Homework, you know. I am this close *shows distance with thumb and forefinger* to proving my teachers are in a conspiracy against me.  
  
Seph Lorraine: I know the plot is totally overused, but I'm trying hard to make it original. I felt it was 'dragging', too, and I hope you have a chance to read this just 'cause I don't think it's 'dragging' anymore.  
  
Fei: Glad you liked Heero's witty answer at the diner. Hehehe. It just came to me out of the top of my head, go figure. And yet, unlike most things off the top of my head, it actually turned out well! Thanks for the review.  
  
Eternal Sleeper: Ack! I hate homework, too! That's what took me so long putting this chapter up, but lo and behold, here it is at last! Thanks for the review, and enjoy!  
  
******************************************  
  
Disclaimer: I own nothing, and I don't make money with this. Don't sue me! I plead the fifth! Ummm....yeah!  
  
******************* Found (last chapter of Part 1) *****************  
  
Duo watched as Heero's face paled in shock in front of the laptop screen. He had never seen Heero like that before, and Duo's first thought was of his health, but knew that couldn't be it. Heero had been fine before, so he quickly realized that there was something shocking and/or embarrassing on the screen.  
  
Naturally, the cat-like Duo let curiosity get the best of him and proceeded to walk silently behind the unsuspecting Heero.  
  
"Duo!" A frightened Heero practically jumped out of his seat upon realizing Duo's presence. Duo could never find out that he loved him, even now. Heero had just found out that Duo had always been the center of his world, and as Duo stood across the room, Heero truly knew that he loved Duo more than anything. Beauty shone on him inside and out. Had he ever told Duo how beautiful he was?  
  
"Sorry Hee-chan. I didn't mean to scare you. I didn't think it was possible." Duo began, and Heero was entranced by his voice, unable to speak, but Duo was happy to speak for him.  
  
"Hey, what are you reading?" Duo glanced at the computer, and began to come towards it.  
  
Heero jolted out in front of Duo so that he stood in his path, and so that they were almost touching. Duo stopped right in front of him, and both of them noticed how close they were. They were very close...and, no, this was not a mistake; Heero's timing was impeccable.  
  
Duo took a jolt when Heero stepped between him and the computer, and almost took a fall back in surprise. Heero must have gotten into those files, Duo thought. Anything that well guarded must be pretty embarrassing, he continued with his thoughts.  
  
Normally, Duo could have fantasized situations that Heero would deem 'embarrassing' for hours, but his thoughts were stopped abruptly when he noticed Heero's face. It was so determined, and full of some other expression that Duo couldn't pinpoint at first. He wished that Heero would look at him like that more often; it made him so weak that he could hardly breathe.  
  
"Duo, I don't think the old Heero would want you to see the files." Heero's deep voice sent shivers up Duo's spine, but he quickly snapped out of it to give a response.  
  
"You're right, but there's only one of you, Hee-chan. There will always be only one of you. Memory changes nothing." Duo answered seriously, resisting emotion that was begging to come out, for fear the former perfect soldier would see that he was weak. He had to be strong; he had to be strong for Heero.  
  
Heero looked at eyes of purple velvet and choked back tears of happiness when he heard that Duo saw him as the same person, and nothing less. It meant so much to him. Heero had realized that he was his own person, so it was his right to make his own decisions, and he slowly moved out of Duo's way.  
  
"We're still best friends, right, no matter what?" Heero said softly as Duo looked confused. He would never stop being Heero's friend; Duo loved him more than anything. He wished he could tell Heero that, but to even suggest them not being friends was absurd. Whatever it was on the file, Duo was confident he could take it. Even the most sickening thing he could think of...a love letter to Relena, would not be able to break the ties that he and Heero had.  
  
"We're best friends, always, Hee-chan." Duo said in the most convincing way he could without giving away anything and stood, watching Heero nod and turn his head down to look at his feet,  
  
"Are you sure it's all right to read it. You don't have to let me, you know." Duo looked concerned at the mop of dark hair that seemed to fidget at the question. Maybe it hadn't been the right thing to say. It took Heero so much courage to let Duo in the first place, Duo didn't realize that he was making it even more difficult for Heero. It took even more courage to say what he was thinking out-loud.  
  
"I want you to read it." Heero answered firmly, and kicked himself mentally for that. Duo never lied, he knew that, but Heero highly doubted the survival of their friendship through this. He was still stubborn as always, willing to risk it all..for the one he loved.  
  
Duo nodded and walked over to the computer; still a little amazed that Heero had gotten the files open in the first place, but then he remembered who this was: Heero I-can-do-anything-when-I-set-my-mind-to-it Yuy. Heero always had that kind of persistence that Duo had never possessed. And, yet, when it came to Heero, Duo always found the persistence, but never the initiative. Well, until he read the first entry of the diary, that is.  
  
'...I met a beautiful pilot a week ago with lavender eyes and a smile that brightens my day every time I see it. I found out today that his name is Duo Maxwell, and I think that I love him..'  
  
Duo froze with momentary disbelief and absolute happiness as tears that had waited so long to be shed streamed silently out of his eyes. His heart must have leapt five stories up in the building, and yet it was still there, beating so loud in his ears that the people in the next apartment should have heard.  
  
He came up to Heero, and took the Asian's nervously shaking hands in his own, forcing Heero to look in his tear-stained eyes.  
  
"Do you still feel the same way?" Duo asked softly and Heero averted his eyes, but nodded helplessly.  
  
Duo gently took a hand and placed it on Heero's cheek delicately. Heero looked up to find a true smile on, what was to him, the loveliest face he had ever seen.  
  
"I...I've always loved you, too." Duo stuttered as more tears made their way down his neck and a startled Heero was swept away as Duo pressed his lips against Heero's and they were both enveloped in a kiss that was just as passionate as it was meaningful.  
  
Heero felt like he could no longer hold his own weight on the ground, but was relieved by an arm that slid around his waist as Duo pulled him in closer. They pulled apart before long from lack of air, but two smiles and heavy breathing held unspoken words.  
  
"I'm sorry that I don't know much about you, Duo, but I want to get to know you, no matter how long it takes."  
  
Duo smiled at this. He had always known Heero was human, and a hopeless romantic on the inside, but his assumptions hadn't been proven until just that moment.  
  
"There's nothing to be sorry for, Hee-chan, but I wouldn't mind doing it all over again."  
  
Heero looked at his love once more. "Really?" he said airily as Duo took him once again into a kiss, only this time, Heero closed his eyes, savoring the moment, and the taste of Duo. It was wonderful, like after a windy day in fall and you've come inside and just taken the first sip of hot cocoa. That's what it felt like.  
  
They didn't break contact as they moved across the room and sat on the couch. Duo began to take control of the kiss, and Heero had come to put his arms around Duo's neck to feel hair soft as silk around his fingertips. The kiss gently broke apart as Heero began to speak.  
  
"Tell me everything?" He asked with a slight smile.  
  
"I love you." Duo whispered in his ear.  
  
"Is that everything?" Heero's eyes brightened  
  
"Yes."  
  
Duo smiled mischievously as Heero felt himself being pulled into a soul- searing kiss. Nothing else mattered, because there was nothing else. Heero was in the making of new memories, memories much kinder than those he left behind.  
  
And even with all the pain and happiness they hold, the memories are just things; some things are forever.  
  
************ End of First Part **********  
  
^-^ Short, but sweet, how an ending should be, don't you think? Don't worry! It's not over, yet. I like it too much for it to be over, so I've decided this is just the end to the first part where they discover their undying love for each other...like the end of a phase.  
  
I'm going to keep on with this story's second 'phase' under the same title (and probably around the same number of chapters).  
  
Just to summarize: within this, I will explore Heero and Duo as a couple. That's fun, but this also should also go a little deeper into Heero's memory loss. *smiles* Hope you're looking forward to it as much as I am.  
  
However, this being all well and good, I have to juggle my other two story continuations, too, so hold on with me here while I get my bearings.  
  
Oh, please review, I love reviews!  
  
Thanks for your support, everyone!  
  
-Foxfire 


	7. 2:1 Happy Birthday

This is the second part, because it confuses me to put it under a new title. I'm not too happy with this chapter, but I hope you think it's alright. Just a reminder for those who don't already know or assume: I don't own Gundam Wing.  
  
Part 2-Chapter 1:  
  
Heero yawned as he made his way sleepily through the kitchen, illuminated by the light of the rising sun that came through the open window. He was toasting a couple pieces of the bread Duo had left on the counter with his note. Lazy eyes strayed down to the piece of paper below him, and he looked at Duo's rushed script for a second time with a slight smile.  
  
Good morning,  
  
Out on errands, be back soon.  
  
I have some fresh bread, I'll leave it out.  
  
I think there's butter in the fridge,  
  
but you'd better check the expiration date.  
  
Love, Duo  
  
Heero chuckled to himself, as he took the freshly-toasted bread from the toaster, almost dropping it upon noticing how hot it was. He doubted if there even would be an expiration date. It's butter; butter can't spoil, can it, he asked himself as he opened the refrigerator. The butter looked fine, Heero thought as he spread it on one slice to try. Apparently, anything was possible; he realized as he bit into the toast and quickly dumped the rancid butter into the garbage. Or at least, Heero mused, anything was possible around Duo.  
  
He grabbed the remaining, slightly burnt piece of toast in his right hand and bit into it as he sat down at the kitchen table. Pulling his laptop to face him, Heero flipped the screen up with ease, as he let the bread dangle from his mouth and began typing, stopping after a while to pull the bread from his teeth and chew. It would have been much more efficient and less distracting to have simply gotten a plate, but difference did it make, really, he thought. Heero didn't even notice how much the braided, enthusiastic teen had rubbed off on him in the past few days, but anyone who knew Heero before would have been absolutely astounded at the difference.  
  
Looking into the screen, Heero looked over the now familiar file once again. He had spent almost all of the previous night looking it over, inscribing every line into his memory almost as if it had always been there.  
  
Heero subconsciously smiled as he thought about the day before. He would have never thought Duo would love him back. He knew he had everything to loose, and still went ahead with telling Duo anyway, because it wasn't fair to Duo if he was hiding emotion. Heero had convinced himself yesterday that life only holds people back when people hold emotions back from life. The only way to live life was to act on your own emotions...Heero froze at the thought, and widened his eyes attentively as he stopped typing for a moment. Something seemed strangely familiar about that phrase, but quickly deciding that it was nothing, continued with his investigations.  
  
Some of his thoughts, he realized while reading, were so cold sometimes. Just the things he had written made it seem that he never really had anyone to care for him or anyone to care for, and Duo easily had infatuated his every thought that wasn't about missions. Reading further, Heero noticed that his accounts were so based on fact and thought that there was barely any feeling at all, and what emotions he did show were still documented as if it was a report. Heero wondered just how scarce his emotions were before the accident, because now his heart felt so full, and it was hard to imagine otherwise.  
  
Sensitive ears heard the fiddling of keys into the lock outside the apartment door, and Heero glanced over to the door, smiling. It was something he would have never done before he lost his memory, but something made him want to make Duo happy, and he knew that Duo liked it when he smiled. Of course, the smile wasn't forced, but Heero had to think to allow it to come, and accepted it willingly.  
  
The door flew open, and Duo's hand busily let go of the keys, still inside the lock, so that he could pick up the bags he had to bring inside. It really was about time he went grocery shopping, but, of course, Duo probably wouldn't have taken the initiative for another couple of days had it not been for Heero. Duo really wouldn't mind all that much if he got sick from eating sweet pickles that tasted sour, but he would mind if Heero did.  
  
It took Duo a moment to look up from the bags he brought in, and almost didn't notice Heero sitting so quietly, and smiling ever so faintly at the kitchen table. The violet eyes lit up immediately and a grin spread across his face as he started to unpack the food.  
  
"How was breakfast?" Duo asked, looking hopefully at the Asian who was still deep in thought. Duo had gone out to shop for them, and he wasn't even pulling his weight around, not in chores, cooking, money, errands, and he realized that Duo wanted to take care of him, but Heero felt like he was imposing even more than before.  
  
"Good."  
  
It was no surprise to Duo that Heero wasn't being very talkative because it had always been that way in the past, and it took him a moment to remember that this was the Heero that had allowed him to discover his deepest secret, and if this Heero wasn't answering, something was definitely up.  
  
"Hee-chan," Duo walked over to Heero with concern, "What's up?" He pulled a chair backwards, and crossing his arms over the top in a thoughtful position as he sat down. Heero looked up from the laptop quickly.  
  
"Sorry, Duo," Heero feigned a smile, "Everything's fine." Duo looked curiously at the owner of a mess of dark, unbridled hair. He could tell everything was not fine.  
  
"S'okay. You can tell me whenever you want, you know." Duo said thoughtfully as he made his way back out of the chair, and Heero nodded his head in thanks.  
  
Duo didn't want to push this one, after all, he really had no idea what Heero had been going through. Trowa was the only other person Duo could think of who had gotten amnesia at one point or another, and luckily, he recovered. Heero's case was a little different, though. His brain had been so severely damaged in his memory that the doctors doubted anything would ever come back to him. Of course, Duo was willing, more than ever, to have Heero stay with him for as long possible. Who knows what would happen to them if his memory ever did come back, but he didn't want to think about that.  
  
Duo kissed Heero lightly to break some of the tension that still hung in the room from Heero's insecurities about becoming a burden and started to put away a can of chicken soup in silence. This was a very quiet morning for Duo.  
  
Usually, to keep him company, the dynamic teen had music blasting on his stereo, and then an fuming Mr. Wilkinson from next-door would knock on his door, howling about 'blasted young'ins' and their 'infernal rock music'. The neighbors would always find something to complain about. Duo smirked. Mr. Wilkinson would probably come knocking on his door this morning to complain that he was being much too quiet and therefore, was up to no good. Well, actually, this accusation would most likely have been true any other day, but the awkward mix of emotion left Duo's apartment dissonantly quiet.  
  
"What do you want to do today?" Duo broke the silence as Heero was finishing the last bit of his burnt, butter-less toast. He didn't seem to mind it.  
  
"What did you have in mind?" Heero responded quickly.  
  
"I was wondering if you wanted any, well, new clothes," Duo looked Heero over. He was wearing the usual spandex shorts, green tank top, ugly yellow sneakers, and those were really all the clothes that Sally found in Heero's possession, aside from a single pair of jeans and a suit that he used working with the preventers. Duo still held himself steadfast to the belief that Heero seriously needed a new wardrobe.  
  
"What's wrong with my clothes?" Heero looked puzzled. Something such as clothing did not seem to be a priority.  
  
"Nothing, Hee-chan, you look good in anything," Duo winked as Heero blushed, "But you might want something a little different, you know, just so that you don't feel like you're wearing someone else's clothes. . ." Duo shrugged, he figured that was how he'd feel if put in the situation, and Heero understood exactly what he was saying. He hadn't considered how he might feel with things that he actually felt were 'his'. It seemed like a good idea.  
  
"That sounds fine," Heero said. Duo lit up with joy. He could think of at least ten different outfits on Heero that would make any  
  
"But Duo?"  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"I can't pay for all this, I don't think."  
  
"You're right. Working for the preventers doesn't bring in much, does it? My guess is that you got most of your money by hacking into rich guys' accounts and stealing their credit card numbers, because you always seemed to have a little too much money on your hands," The voluble man stopped to laugh a little, "Don't worry, it's my treat."  
  
"You're part of the preventers, too, Duo." Heero raised an eyebrow in question.  
  
"Eh, I keep my day job." Duo said casually, grinning at the light humor. Heero remained confused, and Duo stopped what he was doing to look at an adorable face the Asian was making. "That's a joke, Hee-chan." Duo stated, but Heero's face remained the same, and Duo chuckled lovingly as he went back to putting the groceries away.  
  
"I can't allow you to spend your money on me," Heero said quite seriously. Duo knew that Heero had always been this selfless, but he would try to hide it, for a reason that Duo did not know. It probably was considered a 'weakness' to him, but what wasn't. Emotions are, indefinitely, a weakness, but only because they can also be the greatest of strengths.  
  
"Why not? It'll be a present!" Duo beamed at the idea.  
  
"Why would you give me a present? I don't need anything, not really. . ."  
  
Duo shrugged, "Maybe not, but there's always a reason to celebrate. . ." He thought a second, "Happy birthday, Heero!"  
  
An identity had to start somewhere, Duo knew; what better way then to start with a birthday?  
  
"It's my birthday?" Heero asked innocently, eyes widening hopefully. It looked very childish to Duo, but probably only because he wasn't used to Heero acting this way. Heero blinked a couple of times before actually processing the information. "Today?"  
  
"Why not?"  
  
Heero looked at him strangely, "You don't know my birthday?"  
  
"Sure, I do. I just found out. It's today." Duo smirked happily.  
  
"Hn?" It was very hard to argue with Duo, especially in the shocked state that Heero was currently in. It didn't even leave him the able of his already challenged verbal skills. Now, he had gone back the 'Hn's'. It was never a good sign. Duo had definitely won this one.  
  
"Good, it's decided. We're going birthday shopping!" Duo turned back to the bags decisively. Duo looked back quickly as he saw a taciturn Heero, looking thoughtfully out the window. He rummaged through the paper bags, "Now, where did the cookies go. . . ?"  
  
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _  
  
It didn't take them long to find a parking spot around the local mall, seeing as how it just opened. Duo wanted to beat the crowds. He got excitedly out of his car, waiting for a perfectly calm Heero to exit as well. Heero didn't know any better than to be so composed, while another person (knowing Duo well) would have politely turned down (or run away screaming at) the offer of shopping with him.  
  
A bouncy Duo in his favorite black leather jacket tugged on Heero's arm playfully.  
  
"Come on, Hee-chan, I know the perfect store for you!" Heero let Duo lead the way around the spacious halls until they came to the place Duo had mentioned. It didn't seem like anything special. They went inside and Duo encouraged Heero to pick out whatever he wanted and ten minutes later. . .  
  
"Geez, Heero, would you pick something already? We haven't even hit the dressing rooms yet. Do you want my help, because I do have experience, and I promise I won't make you wear anything black. . . well, not much, anyway. . ." Duo continued with his wandering thoughts, but was interrupted by Heero, who emerged from the clothing racks with a green tank top in one hand, and a pair of spandex shorts in the other, raising one eyebrow, almost as much in awe of his choice as Duo was.  
  
Duo buried a hand in his forehead, expressing clearly how hopeless he thought Heero was, "Do you really want these clothes?"  
  
Heero shook his head expressively 'no' as Duo took his boyfriend's choice clothing back on the rack. Heero really never had any sense of fashion to begin with, but he'd already guessed that, and was very glad to help. Within thirty seconds, Duo was back, carrying a pair of black pants and a loose blue long-sleeved shirt. Basic, true, but Heero was a basic kind of guy, and Duo didn't want him to feel awkward. Besides, the blue would bring out the color in his eyes.  
  
Heero didn't have any objections to the outfit when he tried it on, and Duo was thrilled to see Heero in something normal. They quickly made the purchase. Heero was glad, and finally felt he had something was truly his.  
  
"Thanks for the birthday present, Duo," Heero smiled, still feeling a little out-of-place, but more fitting than he had before as he got in passenger seat of the car. Duo kissed Heero rather randomly just then, and Heero blushed and looked out the window to see if someone had been watching. There was no one, and he delicately accepted a second, letting untamed emotions run up his spine as he looked into violet eyes.  
  
"You're welcome. Happy birthday, Hee-koi." Duo said gently and started up the car, making their way back to the house, but Heero couldn't help but notice that there was something sad about Duo during the car ride. He hardly said anything at all.  
  
The truth was, he was thinking about Heero. He was so innocent, so free, but sooner or later, he'd have to tell Heero about how things were, how many people they killed. Heero already knew some, but it wasn't enough. The preventers had given Duo this job for a reason, and Sally knew it, too. Heero needed to remember death more than anything, or else peace would mean nothing to him, as it was taken for granted by almost everyone else. The old Heero would want Duo to make him understand, but somehow, Duo didn't feel right about it. _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _  
  
Heero's thoughts as they got home were everywhere but on the clothes along with the rest of his 'birthday'. Something was always going to be kept hidden from him. There was always going to be something that he didn't know, because he couldn't remember his past. What could have happened that made Duo act this way? Heero knew Duo loved him. It was in every word that Duo said, the way he moved, and the way he listened and looked at him when Heero had something to say. And yet, every smile that wasn't a smile towards him, Heero found looked almost fake, like something on the face of someone in an ordinary painting, nothing special. The action was there, but the emotion wasn't.  
  
Heero wanted to help. He wanted to sit down with Duo and tell him everything was okay, but he wouldn't know how to start. He hadn't been through any of the things Duo had, well, at least he didn't remember. The only thing that made him want to remember was Duo. Heero wanted Duo to be happy, but he couldn't help, and it was killing him to see Duo that way. . . He would do anything to stop that pained look in beautiful violet eyes.  
  
"Why did they ask you to take care of me?" Duo looked back at the face that asked the question. He was taken aback.  
  
"You've always been a major player on the team, Heero, and everyone needs you; not only as a co-worker, but as a friend. You've got a lot of friends, Heero, as much as you may have liked to think you didn't, you do. None of us want to see you like this."  
  
Heero nodded submissively. It was true. He had seen that he did indeed have friends, and even someone to love, but that still didn't answer his question.  
  
"There must be something specific they wanted you to tell me, though, so that I would be able to work effectively again." Heero pressed on, and Duo sighed, it was going to come to this at one point or another, and Heero's perception of the situation was more acute than any of them had expected it to be after the trauma of loosing all of his memory.  
  
"Working with the preventers wouldn't mean as much as it does to the rest of us if you don't remember going through it. All the pain and the horrors of war; I suppose that's what they wanted me to tell you. . . But as much as I care about my job, I care about you a hell of a lot more about you. No one deserves those memories." Duo clenched his fists in a moment of frustration, "Especially not you."  
  
Heero watched on as Duo told all this to him, pacing the room nervously, and twisting the end of his braid around a forefinger in apprehension, same violet eyes trembled with pain. Heero saw that Duo needed him, and wanted to help, so he quickly came up to a tense Duo, placing one arm lightly around him.  
  
"I had those memories once, I can deal with them again, I'm sure," Heero looked up at his love hopefully, pulling Duo closer.  
  
Duo looked at Heero, eyes brimming with tears, but smiled at the action, even though the perfect soldier wouldn't understand. . . How could he possibly understand if he couldn't remember. . . ?  
  
Scenes of death and destruction and Sister Helen and everyone who had died because of him flashed through Duo's head. It made him tremble with sadness. He wished he could do it all over again. Maybe none of it would have happened. Duo leaned his head on Heero's shoulder, and tried to forget.  
  
Heero didn't remember ever being acquainted with death, but he still had his arms clasped tightly around Duo, bringing violet eyes comfort in the memory of pain. One would think Heero would be the one crying, but he had no reason, and yet, seeing Duo doubled over in the misery of his memories, Heero wished that he could cry. But the tears wouldn't come.  
  
Duo broke from tears as he felt the warmth of Heero hugging him. He realized once and for all that he didn't love Heero for the memories they once shared, but for who Heero was; everything about him. And Heero loved him back.  
  
Duo cried in sadness, and Duo cried in joy, but the two were never defined in the moment Heero held him in his arms.  
  
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Thanks to Reviewers:  
  
Jeysien: Yeah, I know, I'm a complete sap for a happy ending. I defiantly agree that there must be pain before true joy, which justifies that last chapter, I think. *smiles*  
  
Fei: Glad you like it, but now they're back to the beginning again, with lots of problems, so this part should get interesting. *winks*  
  
KawaiiAngel4: Thank you! I'm really happy you like it.  
  
Firefox: hehehe, we do have similar names, don't we. . .eh, *shrugs* I always seem to pick the name that everyone has, unintentionally of course. Oh, well, they're cool names anyway! Glad you like the story.  
  
SoulSister: Yeah, I got a little teary-eyed, too. I was really tired of the 'keeping secrets' thing, then, but as you can see, I've gone back in this chapter. Thanks so much.  
  
Eternal-Sleeper: Thank you! *grins* I hope you liked this chapter. I really shouldn't have candy either. . . and I make sure not to have any before writing. You really don't want to see the results. . . (lol)  
  
Lillie chan: Yay! *claps hands excitedly* it worked. Thanks.  
  
Samptra: Thanks for your support. I hope you liked this chapter.  
  
Diane: I had been thinking about three phases before, but there's only so much I can do with Heero's memory loss. I was eager to include Heero and getting his memory back in this phase, but I didn't want to give anything away for hopes of further tension and anxiety. I might be able to squeeze a third phase out of this, but it would be a stretch. I'll see what I can think of. Thanks for the thought. You're exactly right about my motive for having Heero let Duo read the entry. I didn't want to deal with Heero's anger at Duo, because it would have gotten too complicated when Heero gets his memory back. He's going to have enough to deal with. *smiles* Thanks for your review!  
  
Hakumei: Thanks! I think I have the 'insane' part taken care of (lol). I'm so glad you liked it! I value your opinion, and I really like your story, 'Minuet in G'! ^-^  
  
Tigerlily26: I know, it was really sappy. . . I wasn't so sure about it when I put it up, and after reading it through, I considered throwing it away and writing a new one, so I'm glad it wasn't as bad as I thought. Thanks!  
  
**********************  
  
^-^ Please Review.  
  
I love reviews!  
  
Thank you! 


	8. 2:2 Pity for Tears

Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam wing.  
  
****************A/N**************  
  
Eh. . .  
  
I didn't mean for the first part of this chapter to take up all of my usual allotted space, so (for fun, and because I'm really sorry this is so late) I have made this one twice as long.  
  
*********************************  
  
Laptop Journal Entry: Date, Unknown:  
  
"I never meant for this to happen. I couldn't do anything to stop them, and it was Duo's own fault for getting caught, yes. But then, how is it that I can't sleep at night? It's nearly three in the morning, now, and I have a mission tomorrow. I hate how I can't stop thinking about him. Dr. J told me I had no weakness. I see now that he was so wrong, because when you act on your emotions, there will always be weakness. When I'm around him, everything seems so right; so right that I fear he is everything I can never be. Perhaps that's why I can't, and don't want to let go.  
  
No one ever was brave enough to befriend me before. Perhaps that's what Dr. J meant, that no one would dare befriend me, and he didn't believe I would be fool enough to befriend another. Obviously Dr. J hasn't met Duo.  
  
I want so badly to rescue him, but I need to have faith in him for both our sakes. This war can't be won if we waste time bothering with each other. If I were captured, I wouldn't want anyone to jeopardize his or her mission by rescuing me. But this thinking is corrupted; Duo would rescue me anyway, because he has that annoying, obnoxious, caring, emotional, wonderful disregard for orders.  
  
I can never be like him; that's why I have to save him. I can never be like him; that's why I'm cursed to love him.  
  
-Heero Yuy"  
  
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _  
  
Heero blinked up from the illuminated gel screen of the laptop after reading this entry and let his eyes adjust to the darkness of the room a little before turning it off and into complete darkness. There was no mistaking it. These were his entries; his thoughts; but it wasn't his life anymore. And yet, how was it that he missed memory so much. Memory had plagued Duo, Heero knew, but it was part of who he was, just as it had been for him. Heero didn't feel empty, though. He was filled with emotion, filled with joy, which he could tell from his entries, it was joy that he never knew.  
  
Heero looked at the door as light streamed through. He hadn't noticed how dark the room had gotten in two hour's time just sitting and reading beside the light of the open windows. Duo walked in the room.  
  
"Heero?" He asked the black of the room, "What are you doing in here? It's dark!" Duo didn't bother to look around for the face, and simply went straight for the lamp, nearly stumbling over the coffee table as he reached the pull-chain.  
  
"I was just looking-over my computer for some things." Heero said, standing up for the first time in nearly two hours, and covering his eyes lightly with his right hand spread across his face as the light shone straight into his face when he looked at Duo.  
  
"Wait a sec," Duo said as Heero put his hand down, his eyes already having gotten used to the light.  
  
"Hn?" Heero raised one eyebrow dangerously high.  
  
"No, no, do that again!" Duo grinned at a blank Heero, "You know, the . . . the hand thing!" Duo spread his right hand across his face mockingly, and Heero kind of made an 'oh' noise.  
  
"You mean this?" Heero jetted his right elbow out to the right of his head as the right hand spread its fingers across his face.  
  
"Yeah!" Duo exclaimed excitedly, raising a finger, "That's a really good pose for you (1), you know that?" Heero let his hand down gently to his side and shrugged.  
  
"Yeah, that'd be great. I can look like a really bright light is shining in my eyes all the time." Heero mumbled as he turned away to re-charge his laptop. Duo widened his eyes and froze in shock.  
  
"Sarcasm . . . from the perfect soldier?" Duo smirked, "I thought I'd never see the day."  
  
"That's not me anymore." Heero finished, looking up into violet eyes that shone with love, admiration and unnecessary sympathy. There was silence a moment before Duo moved over to the table by the side of the small couch.  
  
"I'm sorry about this morning. I really didn't mean to start feeling sorry for myself . . . to you, especially. I feel really bad." He started re- arranging the photographs on the table apprehensively. Heero thought it was better not to tell Duo that it was okay, because words wouldn't help, and just to get Duo's mind off the subject would make it much better.  
  
Looking at the pictures Duo was looking over, Heero saw one that caught his eye especially. He and Duo were in soldier's uniforms in a hangar of some sort with two undistinguishable mobile suits in the background. Duo was looking rather cheerful with his left arm slung around him like a lifeline. Heero thought it was amusing to see him in the picture. To others, it might've seemed as if he was angry, but Heero saw himself blushing in the picture. No one would have guessed that's actually what he was feeling.  
  
"You like that picture?" Duo asked, pointing at the framed photo that Heero still carried in his hands, before putting it back in the front where he found it.  
  
"We were in the war, then." Heero reflected, almost a question, but decidedly not, Duo chose not to answer, "Why are you so happy?"  
  
Duo froze, looking at the picture once more. He did, indeed, look very happy, and even had a peace sign plastered subtly to the side in Duo's right hand. Heero was fairly certain of the answer according to Duo's actions, but he had to be sure that Duo knew. It was more important for him, if anything, to help his friend as Duo had helped him so much before.  
  
"You know, Hee-chan?" Duo collapsed onto the couch with a heavy sigh, "I wasn't happy." Heero sat down on the couch next to Duo, and slipped his arm around the frail waist. "I felt like I had to live like every day was my last, and I fooled myself into thinking I was so happy just to be alive, when I really wanted to die, Heero. We all wanted to die at some point or another." Duo stopped a moment as Heero squeezed his arm tighter, but not too tight around his waist, and Duo met Heero's hand with his own.  
  
Duo was very sure that Heero didn't care to live or die during those years, and he certainly kept himself on the in-between most of the time. It became increasingly harder to tell if Heero was among the living as the years of the war wore on. They said Heero was warming up to the world, but Duo could only feel him growing colder, and Quatre's 'soul of outer space' had agreed on several occasions. Often, when Duo ran into trouble, he would come to Quatre for help, because Trowa and Wufei might listen, but it was doubtful that they would take him seriously. Of course, Duo trusted his life with every one of them, but they had never been the most agreeable of people to talk to with problems.  
  
"Can I get you some water? A sandwich? Anything?" Duo asked frailly, although he made no attempt to pull away from Heero's hold. It was comforting, and Heero was content to keep Duo there as long as it took to comfort him.  
  
"I'm fine." Heero answered, smiling slightly.  
  
/ding, dong/ The doorbell rang.  
  
"Let them ring." Duo said, snuggling into Heero's shoulder.  
  
/ding dong! ding dong!/ It sounded louder the second time.  
  
"We'd better answer. It might be important." Heero said letting go of Duo's waist and they both rose from the couch in annoyance. The ringing continued and Duo grumbled as he went to the door. No one he knew well would come to his door without calling. It was very rude, but since Heero had encouraged him to, he might as well answer the door.  
  
Duo sighed, reaching for the door, which was still being pounded hard upon, as if the person on the other end was very irritated. Heero stood behind him, looking as busy as someone who had nothing to do could look when the door opened, but his expression changed very quickly to a mix of distaste and surprise when the visitor threw herself upon him obsessively. Duo narrowed his eyes, staring out into the empty hall, and praying to God their unexpected visitor wasn't who she seemed to be.  
  
"Heeeerrrroooo!" The girl yelled as her arms threw themselves around Heero's neck almost so that he wasn't able to breathe.  
  
"Ahem!" Duo cleared his throat as he turned around, trying to act as composed as possible as he restrained himself from doing something irrational. "Relena," he strained a weak smile, "I thought the vice foreign minister was going to be holding a conference on L3 this week."  
  
Relena took her arms off Heero and turned around to greet her host, "Well, Duo, I decided to take a brief detour. I hope you don't mind." She smiled at him before turning to Heero again, completely ignoring his confused expression.  
  
Heero was still in an indescribable state of shock, because he didn't exactly feel comfortable having a complete stranger throw her arms around him. Was he supposed to know her? Well, obviously . . . but did he like her? Duo obviously didn't, Heero saw. Duo's violet eyes had lost their brilliant vibrancy, and turned dark with revulsion as he stood facing the young woman in pink. Heero didn't know what to say. She seemed friendly enough, and even pleasant, but Duo had to have a reason to hate her so much.  
  
"I don't mind at all, Miss Relena." Duo tried hard to hide his sarcasm, closing the door behind her. She dismissed this comment and began to ramble about her life to Heero. Heero just stood there, occasionally glancing to see Duo, who was looking over the one-sided conversation distastefully. The day had just gotten more dismal than he could have ever predicted. It was going to take much more than a few hints that she was unwanted to get the obsessive Peacecraft out of there. She, then, all of the sudden, stopped talking about herself for just a minute to sigh innocently as she turned to Duo and actually said something worth listening to. Well, it depended from which angle you heard it.  
  
". . . I must say, I was a bit surprised to see they had chosen you to take care of Heero during his time of need, but you are forgiven. I would be more than happy to take him off your hands." She smiled sweetly, but it wasn't the kind of sweet smile you would expect from an innocent little girl. It was the kind of smile that was so sweet, you feel like hurling, or at least Duo did.  
  
"Is that why you came here, Relena? To tell me you're better fit to take care of Heero? I hardly think you're in a position to decide. I was obviously chosen for a reason." Duo asked, hinging onto his suppressed anger. This reaction from Duo seemed to catch her by surprise, and her smile was erased.  
  
"I -came- to check on Heero." She looked at Heero sadly, "You haven't answered any of my letters."  
  
"And with good reason. . ." Duo mumbled to himself so no one else could hear. The day was getting more dismal by the moment. He recalled all the letters that Sally had shoved into that suitcase she gave Heero. Most likely, all were from the obsessive girl.  
  
"What was that, Duo?" Relena narrowed her eyes at the braided man. She had heard, and Duo didn't care as he stared her down.  
  
"Nothing, Relena," he growled.  
  
"Fine," Relena crossed her arms indignantly, "You wouldn't mind making us all some tea, then." She attempted to get Duo out of the room, and it was too bad that Duo too polite for Heero's sake to do anything except agree, but Heero could see the equaled hatred they had for one another bouncing back and forth as Duo went to get her some tea.  
  
Duo hadn't acted like that before, so far as Heero could remember, and he couldn't stand to see his love so distressed, all because of this 'Relena' and her obvious attachment to him. Didn't she know that he could never like her -that- way? He must have told her, right?  
  
"Excuse me a moment." Heero told Relena as he headed off for the kitchen after Duo.  
  
He found Duo frowning over the teakettle as he filled it with water in the sink. Bright violet eyes shone up at Heero with a genuine smile.  
  
"Hey, Hee-chan, you'd better go watch over the queen of the world for me, make sure she doesn't jack the lamp." He chuckled lightly, but only grinned wider when he saw the serious face attached to the mop of brown hair. "What?!"  
  
"Who is she?" He asked acutely.  
  
"Vice foreign minister, 'voice of the people', frighteningly obsessive?. . .please, take your pick." Duo laughed out loud as he set the stove temperature and placed the kettle on top of the front burner.  
  
"Then how do I know her, exactly?" He asked confusedly.  
  
"That would be choice 'c', frighteningly obsessive. She's been stalking you ever since you first met, if I'm correct. . ." Duo grabbed a jar of home- picked chamomile that Quatre had given him once-upon-a-time and poured some into a mesh cloth, ". . . practically threw you off the deep end during the war. I remember when you locked and bolted the front of the safe-house because she could have possibly traced a call Wufei had made to Sally one day. That was a riot! The protection came in really handy, though, when OZ found us later that week." He tested the temperature of the smoke over the kettle; just about done.  
  
"Has she always been so. . ." Heero searched for the word.  
  
"Pushy?" Duo suggested, and Heero nodded, "Yeah." He looked down at the single black mug on the counter, "You want some tea?"  
  
"No thanks, Duo." Heero said, smiling at the random question.  
  
"Yeah; I'm not really in the mood either, but this stuff Quatre gave me makes some pretty good tea." He shook the jar gently before placing it back in the cabinet, and picking up the mug to bring into Relena, but he didn't move any further.  
  
"What's wrong?" Heero asked.  
  
"It's just that. . ." Duo reflected quietly, "Well, I was always a little afraid you might choose her over me, is all. You know, so she'd stop bothering you." He looked down sorrowfully, but Heero came closer to Duo and lifted the braided boy's chin up.  
  
"I would never do that." Heero said, planting a kiss on Duo's lips that was short, but sweet, and left a blush when he pulled away.  
  
"Thanks." Duo was silent a moment with renewed reassurance, as violet pools swam with emotion at the dark blue ones that shone with radiance before he took a deep breath, "ready to face her?" Duo asked gently, and Heero nodded. Duo clutched the mug tightly as he walked into the living room, followed closely by the other.  
  
"Here's your tea." Duo threw the mug onto the coffee table before grabbing a chair and inviting her silently and reluctantly to sit down. Relena sat down in the chair across from Duo, smoothing the folds in her dress, before picking up the black plastic mug with Duo's favorite radio station and logo pasted all over the front.  
  
Duo didn't bother owning any fine China or anything; never had. If anyone asked, it cost too much and it's much too breakable for the kind of living he was used to, but the real reason Duo kept his cheap dishware and other less-than-sophisticated items was that everything he owned had sentimental value, a story, if you will.  
  
This particular mug was a consolation prize when he called-in at the radio station to answer some questions to win a ticket to his favorite band's next concert. Of course he got the questions right, but he asked them to mail the ticket Hilde's apartment. Duo knew how much she wanted to see the concert, and he needed to stay home and fill out some more paperwork, anyway. Duo remembered laughing as they called her his girlfriend and wrote them a 'thank you' letter when he received the black mug in the mail a week later.  
  
This gesture had actually led him to apply for a job as an announcer at the radio station a year later. Thursdays from 11pm to 3 in the morning Duo had his very own program.  
  
"Don't you have anything more suitable to drink tea in? I could give you a nice tea set if you want." Relena criticized, bringing the plastic mug to her lips.  
  
"Well, I'm sorry if it doesn't meet your standards." Duo hissed, and looked up at Heero, who was still standing on the other side of the room. His voice softened considerably, although still irritated, Duo was not about to turn his anger back on the only person who had ever truly made him happy.  
  
"You can sit, you know." Duo motioned Heero over. "This is Relena." Duo left it at that.  
  
Heero looked at the girl across the table, and saw Duo huffing to his side. Heero took Duo's hand in his underneath the table and Duo's eyes brightened like a child's opening a Christmas present as he looked at Heero, who was staring across at Relena the whole time, but was slightly smiling at Duo's reaction from the corner of his eye.  
  
"I suppose he doesn't remember me, does he?" Relena said sadly, breaking the intimate unspoken conversation between them with a most unpleasant topic.  
  
"No, I don't." Heero finally spoke, dropping hands with Duo to cross his arms. "I'm lucky to be alive."  
  
"You're right. I am so sorry." Relena bit her lip, "I suppose Duo hasn't told you anything about me, then." She shot a quarrelsome glance at the braided young man who rolled his eyes as he put his hands behind his head, pushing away from the table with his feet so that the chair was balanced on the hind legs.  
  
"What's there to tell?" he smirked.  
  
"Duo!" The vice foreign minister looked at him crossly, "I'd appreciate a moment ALONE with Heero!"  
  
"Geez! Get over yourself!!" Duo came down from the balance of his chair and stood up so that he was high above the two, finally having lost patience. "Heero has never loved you. Just because he can't remember that doesn't make it any different! He rejected you over two years ago. This might be a good time to move on." Duo stopped as Relena stood, eyes shining with hurt.  
  
"I think we can let Heero decide THAT!" She yelled meekly as tears began to surface. "Well, Heero?!" She turned over to Heero, fragile emotion finally taking its toll.  
  
Duo looked at Relena, and suddenly almost regretted his harsh words. They had been such harsh rivals for Heero's affections that Duo had forgotten that as annoying, obnoxious, arrogant, and obsessive Relena was, she was still human. Duo was ashamed of his words, even though he had no reason to be. You should never feel ashamed of the truth.  
  
Heero stood in-between the two magnetic forces, immediately repelling one another. He saw a lost girl on the verge of second heartbreak, and a rightfully angered Duo who was softening at the sight of tears. Heero felt himself drawn towards Duo, it always had been, but he knew he felt sorry for the disagreeable young woman. That's what it was . . . pity. Who knew that a soldier would be able to feel pity? Duo always did, and that, no doubt, is what made him suffer even after so many years.  
  
"Heero?!" Relena screamed, almost pleadingly; selfishly. She leaned her hands onto the table in front of her and looked down into her tea as a few stray tears dropped into the rosy liquid. However, Relena's sadness was soon glossed by hatred.  
  
"This is your entire fault, Duo." She told the ground before coming up to face both of them. "I've already had some of my representatives speak to Sally about Heero's care under the terms that he cannot possibly obtain his entire past from the perspective of a single person," Duo froze at the suggestion, "She has agreed."  
  
"What do you mean? That's impossible! You have to have Heero's consent!" Duo snapped back angrily.  
  
"But of course, I do!" Relena threw her arms around Heero possessively, but the strong, speechless young man pushed her away with ease and an obvious 'No!' before running out of the living room and into Duo's bedroom. It was a childish thing to do, running away, but children only run because they are confused, and Heero was just about as confused as he could possibly be at that point. It hadn't mattered so much that he couldn't remember when he was with Duo because it was never pressed upon him that he had to remember, but now, exposed to the real world for once in a long time, he didn't know what to do.  
  
"Now, look what you've done!" Duo growled at her as he ran close behind Heero, finding him sitting on the edge of the black bed in the unlit room, looking at the bookshelf that seemed to blur under his vision as Heero's forehead grew hot with a feeling he couldn't explain. The open window cooled him off a bit, and let light shine lightly upon him, which made Heero look, to Duo, almost celestial.  
  
"Hey, Hee-chan. . . are you alright?" Duo put an arm around his love's shoulder, and Heero threw his arms around Duo helplessly, although he still refused to cry. Duo ran circles on Heero's back to comfort him, and for the moment, seemed to help. They were lost in each other for a minute before Heero pulled away  
  
"Sorry." Heero said finally. Duo nodded, half-smiling, because he knew that whatever Relena wanted, she got, no matter the cost.  
  
Of course, as Heero and Duo sat whispering and comforting one another, blinding to everything else, they didn't notice that Relena stood outside the doorframe, watching their every move including a short kiss, and a tear ran down her cheek.  
  
"So whatdya say to going out there and telling Miss Relena that she's not welcome here, huh, Hee-chan?" Duo suggested.  
  
"Hai." Heero nodded, still holding Duo's hand as they stood and walked into the illuminated living room only to find that Relena was gone.  
  
The room was as it had always been. There was a couch, lamp, table, chairs, and half a mug of Quatre's famed chamomile tea, but there was one change. Relena was gone, and in her place, a small note was pinned to the damp bottom of the mug.  
  
Duo let go of Heero's hand to walk over to the scene, and picked up the pink piece of paper, obviously from Relena. She had even left her pen and cap on the table from when she must have left in haste.  
  
Duo grew distant as he read the note, and Heero came to put a loving hand on his shoulder as he peered over it to read what the note said.  
  
'I am sorry, Heero. You must be happy.  
  
-Relena'  
  
Heero looked sympathetically at the elegant handwriting. He didn't mean to hurt her, even though he knew that it would.  
  
"I suppose," He started, "there are worse things than a broken heart?"  
  
"Hee-chan," violet eyes met blue, "This happened a long time ago; she only just realized it."  
  
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _  
  
The minutes wore on after Relena left as if they were stuck waiting for the sun to come out. Although beautiful outside, it was still a little overcast in Duo's apartment, to say the least.  
  
Duo and Heero had immediately sat down to finish the cuddling they were so rudely interrupted by earlier, and Heero had taken to a particular strand of Duo's hair that had come unwound in all the excitement, and was playing with it around his forefinger. They didn't look at each other, for fear they might break the wonderful spell that had cast itself over the room and end-up lusting instead of caring for one another. It was the caring feeling that they needed more than ever, now.  
  
"Duo?" Heero asked the young man he held from behind, who had his eyes closed contently, sinking into Heero's lap as much as was possible with his light weight.  
  
"Yeah." the voice rang out wistfully as Duo tilted his head inwards to Heero's chest.  
  
"I didn't know you read William Blake (2)." Heero's hawk-like eyesight had picked-up the title of one of the books scattered aimlessly around the room. This particular one was caught on the ground between the standing lamp and the wall behind the couch where it was insured never to see the light of day again. Well . . . unless you're Heero.  
  
"You don't know a lot of things." Duo chuckled a little, opening his eyes to scope the room for the location of the long-lost book. There was silence for a moment, "Wait, how do you know about William Blake?"  
  
"What do you mean? He's a poet . . . died in 1827, if I'm correct." Heero said quite stiffly, and Duo, to his surprise, shot his head up as if this was the best news since the end of the war. He looked Heero straight in the eyes with a hopeful smile.  
  
"Do you remember anything else?" Duo asked excitedly, shaking his hands for an idea to come to him, "What about Shakespeare? What plays has he written? Do you remember?"  
  
Heero opened his eyes wide with realization, "Hamlet, King Lear, The Tempest, Julius Ceasar. . . Yes, I. . .remember." Heero stared surprisedly, as Duo's smile brightened. He was actually remembering something!  
  
"Do you. . ." Duo paused, "Remember the time I was taken hostage by OZ, and you came to get me against your mission assignment. That's something memorable. . . or at least it was to me."  
  
Heero searched his mind for an answer, ravenously, devouring every last piece of what he could remember and taking it apart like a machine. Einstein's theory of relativity? . . . No, that doesn't help. Plank's constant? . . . No, not that either. Alexander the great? . . .Where the hell did that come from?  
  
He realized that what Duo was speaking of was in the entry he read that day. Heero might have said he remembered, and then everything would have been all right, but he knew that whatever recollection of this experience remained with him rested only in the journal.  
  
"No, I'm sorry." Heero said finally and Duo collapsed into the back of the couch with a sigh.  
  
"No need to be sorry, but Shakespere's a start! There's more hope for the return of your memory than we ever expected!" Duo smiled happily and looked outside at the dark night sky before looking his watch. "It is Friday, isn't it?"  
  
"No," Heero replied, "It's only Thursday. Why do you a. . ." His question was cut off by Duo who bounded up from Heero's lap, cursing under his breath as he went into the kitchen, to turn off the stove, it seemed, and again to another few locations gathering who knows what, but it looked like he was preparing to leave.  
  
"Damn," He swore before looking across at Heero, who had long since gotten up from his comfortable position to observe Duo's actions more closely.  
  
"Heero, I'm so sorry I forgot!" Duo said in apology, grabbing a light jacket from the closet and flinging it across the room at a target of dark brown messy hair before picking one for himself, "I'm going to be late!"  
  
"Late for what?" Heero smiled slightly at Duo's hurried behavior as he watched the braid and its owner make his way around the room, gathering what seemed to be a pen, wallet, and card of some sort.  
  
"Well, you don't have to come if you don't want to. . ." Duo's voice trailed off into the kitchen again to grab two containers of yogurt with spoons. ". . . this job only just a few weeks ago so it's kind of hard to get used to the schedule and. . ."  
  
"Duo?" Heero stopped him.  
  
"What?"  
  
"Where are we going?"  
  
"Radio station. . . . sorry about dinner." Duo said simply, handing him a yogurt and slipping on his shoes before walking out the door. Heero followed, still a little confused, into Duo's car as they set off to wherever it was they were going. Duo was happy to explain on the way.  
  
"Well, I'm usually a little low on cash, so I auditioned for this radio announcing job on Thursdays, and I got in. It's not like I can just quit, you understand," Duo sighed as they just missed the green light at the intersection, "And you're liable to loose the job if you call in sick even once."  
  
"And you thought it was Friday?" Heero raised an eyebrow, smiling on the inside.  
  
"Hah, hah, very funny," Duo said, "I'm allowed to forget things, too, you know."  
  
Heero and Duo sat in an awkward silence the rest of the 5-minute trip. Normally, Duo walked because it was murder looking for a parking space, but he would definitely be late that way, and at least he had a chance of being on time this way. Besides, he felt lucky.  
  
Duo parked the car, inhaled his yogurt, and ran up the stairs to the small studio, followed closely by Heero. Duo gave the manager who was on the phone (most likely looking for a last minute replacement) a thumbs-up as he ran to the mike and headphones before the manager had a chance to wring his neck.  
  
They tried to stop Heero at the door, but Duo mouthed the words 'he's with me' as he was put on air, so he was allowed entrance. Heero stumbled into the unfamiliar place, a little uncomfortable, as he took a seat beside Duo.  
  
The clock read exactly 11:00pm as Duo started off with a 'Hello' in his most professional tenor that Heero had never really heard before. The voice sounded really false at first, but it was obviously because he knew Duo so well.  
  
He watched as Duo put the first record on and flipped the switch to turn his microphone off with a satisfied sigh. They were on time.  
  
"Duo! You're late, again!!" The manager stormed in. He was the kind of man who you would expect to find in a secluded cabin somewhere in the middle of Canada, chopping wood for a living. He stared at the young braided ex-pilot from underneath bushy eyebrows, with a beard and hair that hadn't been cut in a year (at least) all of which distracted everyone from his eyes nicely. He might have looked an intimidating lumberman, if not for the tie.  
  
"Sorry, Dan, I wasn't really -late-, though. I came right on time!" Duo gave the manager a winning 'you-know-I'm-innocent' smile. The manager raised his bushy eyebrows so that his eyes were almost a little visible, as if judging the level at which Duo deserved a break, quickly turned them to Heero, and back to Duo again.  
  
"Can your friend speak?" The manager asked, "I can't pay him much, but it'll give him something to do, and I've been getting requests for more than one announcer at a time. The public is really nosy like that." He stopped to look at Heero again, "so?"  
  
"I could do that." Heero replied in his rich, deep voice, and the manager backed away a bit in surprise.  
  
"Okay, you pass the test." He said and looked over at the record that was just about run out, and the needle picked-up, "Better get in there fast, boys." He motioned over to the seats with a grunt and showed a petrified Heero to a second set of headphones, "Go, Go!" He shooed Heero over to the microphone, where Duo already began to introduce him.  
  
"Duo Maxwell, here, on your favorite radio station, bringing you the best of the oldies, and today, we have a very special guest, my pal Heero Yuy. Hey, Heero, you there?"  
  
Heero fumbled around the controls before he found the slot for the headphones, and answered Duo's question quickly into the microphone, as he found the insert and sat down, a little disheveled by the experience.  
  
"I'm here."  
  
"Well, it took you long enough. So, while we're waiting for some song requests to come in, why don't you tell us all a little bit about yourself?" Duo urged, hoping something might jog his memory.  
  
"I. . .uh. . ." Heero stuttered, and Duo saw that he wasn't ready, and saw a red button blinking to his right  
  
"It seems we have a call," he pressed the button, "Hello, Duo Maxwell speaking. You're on the air." He spoke into the grid on the speaker.  
  
"Hello Duo, this is Zechs Marquese." Duo swallowed hard, and Heero was afraid to know why. Was he supposed to know this person, also?  
  
"Why, Hello, Zechs!" Duo strained a cheerful voice, trying to hide how nervous he was. "Would you like to request a song?"  
  
"Yes, actually," the deep voice answered, "I'd like to dedicate this to my little sister, who called me only just this afternoon and she was," He paused for sincerity, "very upset. I hope that you're quite satisfied, and I would like to play 'Pity for a Dime', one of my personal favorites." Zechs hung up right there, and Duo cringed a little at the hidden message as he put on the record and switched off the mike.  
  
"He's Relena's brother, isn't he?" Heero asked acutely. Duo nodded.  
  
"We're in more trouble than we bargained for, I think. I hope that Zechs doesn't go totally mental. He's been known to do that, you know." Growing fears developed in Duo's mind as he recalled the warring times. Heero could only imagine what Duo said, and the situations he received in his mind weren't any less frightening.  
  
They both sat in apprehension, listening to the rest of the song mindlessly. Perhaps, it wasn't a threat, after all. I mean, the song only forced them to think about how they must have hurt Relena. What did Zechs want, anyway? They felt bad enough already, but it wasn't their fault.  
  
"Looks like we have another call. . ." Duo said weakly to Heero after the song ended and put the speaker on air.  
  
"Hi. My name's Madeline from the second sector, and I wanted to ask you a question." Duo brightened at the idea of a question, and was eager to get on a different topic.  
  
"Sure Madeline." The braided boy answered cheerily, "Fire away."  
  
"What did you do to his little sister?"  
  
/mass face fault/  
  
"Why don't you request a song . . .?" Duo suggested as his hand burrowed into his forehead, leaning his elbow into the table.  
  
"No thanks. You sure you don't want to answer?" She asked once more, hopefully.  
  
"Positive. Goodbye Madeline." Duo hung up, looking at Heero before putting on a pre-arranged selection of songs, and taking them off the air again.  
  
"Damn that Zechs! I bet he's getting a pretty good laugh right about now." Duo hissed to himself.  
  
"Don't let him get to you." Heero said, trying to calm him down.  
  
"You're right," Duo sighed, putting his headphones back on, "That's really the worst he can do."  
  
The night wore on, especially quickly for Duo because of Heero's company. There were no more nosy personal questions, and some of the song requests were very nice selections. Altogether, Duo found the experience to be very successful. Heero warmed-up to his position pretty quickly, and soon enough, he was talking almost as much as Duo was. The manager even offered Heero a position on the job as they left at 3:00 in the morning with Duo on Thursdays and Duo jumped in to agree with his boss before Heero had a chance to even accept.  
  
Getting home, they both sat down on Duo's bed to talk a little, but somehow, they both ended up asleep, exhausted, in their clothes on top of the bed. Duo was sprawled out all over the bed and snored lightly, while Heero had curled his knees up as he held the pillow his head was on lightly. It was a cute picture, just knowing that they had both fallen asleep knowing that the other was by their side. Things were definitely going their way, and Relena had been completely forgotten.  
  
**********footnotes***********  
  
I never understood that pose. . . . You know the one at the beginning of the 'Just Communication' opening. Very silly to add, I know, but I need something to balance.  
  
William Blake was a very famous poet (1758-1827). One of his most famous poems is 'The Tyger', which is one of my absolute favorite poems of all time! His poetry often has very varied opinions, and because of this, he's sometimes portrayed as, well, insane, but all great minds are . . . to some extent.  
  
*****************************  
  
Violet Tears: You know what, hehehe, there's actually a funny story to that. I wanted them to go shopping and buy clothes to emphasize the 'new' Heero, but I have a terrible imagination when it comes to fashion, and I was afraid to put more than one outfit in because I would probably make Heero look awful! I know, I should have just said 'they bought a few more outfits' or something. Thanks for bringing it up. Please feel free to ask any more questions, because goodness knows my writing has plenty of mistakes! Thanks for the review! ^-^  
  
Tashue: Thank you so much! Your reviews were so nice. I really appreciate it. I hope this chapter had enough angst: there's lots of it, that's for sure. ^^ I hope you liked it.  
  
Fei: Yes! That's exactly what I was trying to get across in those lines! Joy and sadness do not need to be defined because sometimes they are one in the same. I am SO happy that someone picked-up on that, because it's important. ~grins~ No one else said anything about it, so thank you! I hope you enjoyed this chapter! ^-^  
  
Diane: That answers your question, I hope. ~smiles~ I was going to put Relena in to end the story, but I came up with a better ending, I think, so I hope her entrance wasn't too random. After all, it wouldn't be a very complete story without a Relena confrontation, now, would it? ^-^ Thank you so much for your reviews; they are so great! 


	9. 2:3 Lost Stars

Disclaimer: One would think in all the time I haven't updated, that I would at least be able to acquire some possession of Gundam Wing, but alas, I have had no such luck. I don't own anything (and needless to say I do not own the Beatles, either, who I make reference to in here).  
  
Note: Sorry, I haven't updated in so long. I would really be happy if anyone who was reading this before actually came back to finish for this chapter. I was listening to Beatles love songs writing most of this, not that that means anything, except it turned out mostly fluff ^w^ Not that I don't like fluff, but this is supposed to be angst-y. I went in afterwards and added some tension and a troubling flashback, but I doubt it did much.  
  
So . . . what are you waiting for? This chapter is much more interesting than anything I have to say!  
  
~~~~~~~~~  
  
"Oi, Heero," The braided one shook his head in hopelessness as the previously perfect soldier opened his eyes fuzzily to the semi-darkness of the room, "wake up!"  
  
"Mmm. . . Duo?" Heero rubbed his eyes gently with the back of his hand and Duo blushed at how cute it was when the Asian yawned and closed his eyes once more. The blush quickly faded from the heart-shaped face and it was replaced with a warm smile.  
  
"C'mon, Heero. If you don't get up now, we're gonna miss it!" He leaned over the half-asleep body that curled like a cat in further protest. A long chestnut braid slipped intentionally over Duo's shoulder and the ends brushed the tip of Heero's nose and it was made a further annoyance as the Asian struggled beneath it with a groan and pulled the covers over his head.  
  
It was at this point the covers were tactfully flung from the bed and Heero sprung up, shivering and glaring at the culprit. Duo chuckled slightly.  
  
"Sorry, Hee-chan, but really should get going if we're going to make it in time." He took a half step back, to give Heero time to come out of bed. With a second yawn, the smaller boy stumbled off the bed in nothing more than his boxer shorts, and looked around him, focusing on the window on the wall. The sky was still black as it could be with the many fluorescent lights that lined the city, and he looked at the cheerful Duo who was impatiently bouncing around the room, fully dressed.  
  
"Where are we going?" Heero mumbled sleepily as he rummaged for a spare pair of pants and a shirt. Finding the soft material on a desktop, he slipped the clothing on and made his way, unfocused, into the kitchen where Duo was preparing what looked like breakfast to go. Or rather, breakfast was another word for a couple of zipped plastic bags with cereal inside.  
  
"You'll know soon enough." Duo stated as he snatched a comfortably-sized blanket and threw it in the bag along with everything else, "Come on!" he gestured amusedly at the tired Heero across the room, eyes half-lidded and straining closure, "you can sleep in the car."  
  
Heero stopped short in the widest part of his yawn before finishing quickly with a slightly confused, too-tired-to-be-angry face directed at Duo, who didn't seem to be watching him at the moment, "I'm not a child, you know."  
  
Duo shot his head up in surprise, "I know that Hee-chan, but even adults are allowed to sleep in the car." Duo was about to add that he had several times, but of course he had been driving every one of those times, and he figured it would be against his better judgment to mention that right before they were about to get in the car. Heero caught a sly smile tripping over Duo's lips as if he were the cat who ate the goldfish, but the ex-wing pilot was too busy keeping his eyes open too look any farther into it.  
  
Duo picked up the keys on the counter swiftly, saving every grain of time that could be spent later. When Duo had woken up several minutes before he woke Heero as well, he found himself looking out the window, which wasn't very unusual, but it made him remember the stars. It had been ages since he had been back on the colony. Even though he was terribly homesick, every ounce of his energy since the ending of the war had been spent, though not worthlessly, mind you, with the preventors on earth, helping that Peacecraft girl in her otherwise impossibly idealistic beliefs. This was the best path for him, now, but that didn't make him forget where home was. Even though Sally didn't think Heero had a home, Duo didn't want him to forget what a home really was, even if he couldn't remember. Heero should at least know that he belongs. It had taken Duo nearly 17 years to figure out that he had a home, and Duo wouldn't deny Heero that chance a second time. He grimaced, yes, the second time. Duo knew Heero had missed his first chance at a place to belong a long time ago. All of them had . . . they would have had to in becoming pilots. Even Quatre, who had a place to come home to and a loving family to go back to denied everything for the war. Duo barely knew what he was getting into when he first took to the cockpit of deathscythe, but then again, he had been convinced, then, that he didn't have a home to come back to.  
  
Seeing Heero like this made him think more than ever about his past, and he was beginning to believe more than ever that this terrible misfortune might have been a blessing in disguise. Duo never thought he'd ever stand this close to Heero ever again, in fact, he was sure of it. When Sally called him that day, he thought he had put everything about Heero behind him, but every time he looked at him, it still made his heart skip a beat. Duo had tried to make friends after the war ended, and it wasn't hard for him, being cheerful and friendly to nearly everyone he met, but sometimes he was just lonely. The people who were able to understand that, like Francine and Terry and the rest of the pilots, were his only true friends. All the rest were just very real mirages, but when he was with Heero, there was no emptiness inside him at all. That Heero had all this revealed emptiness, now, Duo had to admit made him feel uncomfortable, but all he wanted to do was fill Heero with everything that life had to offer. He owed Heero that much, after everything his ex-partner had given him, even unconsciously, all these years.  
  
That's only one of the reasons, of course, that Duo was taking Heero out on this very special night to look at the stars. The Leonids come only once every year, and he rarely had the time, or the discipline to get up and see them. Another reason being that the first time he had time to see them was when he and Heero were partners during the war.  
  
~~ flashback ~~  
  
Duo looked over the green-dark room that had Heero's face glowing almost ghostly in the moonlight from his perch on the windowsill. One knee propped against the glass, and the other leg limply down at the side, Duo shifted uncomfortably. It was always so hard to concentrate with the silence that emptied the room whenever Heero was sleeping. Well, he took that back quickly. His stoic partner never said anything, anyway, and on the rare occasion that something left his lips, it was usually in an attempt to get Duo to shut his.  
  
There was just something, Duo thought, about being asleep that never suited him just right. It was a moment of vulnerability . . . he never thought he'd see the day where Heero left himself open to attack. Despite the gun he gripped tightly beneath that pillow, it was still much too difficult to concentrate in that deafening silence. It really wasn't Duo's cup of tea, sitting around the safehouse, trying to be as quiet as possible to avoid suspicion, and yet, he savored moments like these. So blinded, deafened, tasteless, all of his senses were null, and his mind was beginning to slip as well, watching the green darkness descending onto pale cheeks that rested on pillows and weaponry in the bedroom.  
  
He looked back to the night sky. He was a little homesick sometimes, but it was a little ironic, he chuckled inwardly, considering he didn't have a home. The pain he felt must only have been loneliness, he decided, because he didn't need somewhere to belong to. Memories were enough. That's the only reason he was staying up to watch the meteor shower, anyway. It was childish, Duo knew, but wasn't he still a child? He never had his heart set on growing up, as much as time may have prodded him on.  
  
Sister Helen was the one who told him about the meteor showers from earth. Neither of them had ever been off L2 their whole lives, but the outside world was always in question. Being surrounded by a sky of metal was how they lived their lives, and of course there were projections, sometimes, and scheduled artificial rain for vegetation, but Duo had always been curious, and he couldn't learn enough. He recalled telling Sister Helen how he was going to get off the colony one day and travel all around the colonies and earth. Sister Helen would tell him of vast oceans and endless skies, and endless stars.  
  
She had told him that if you ever see a meteor from earth, they call it a shooting star, and if you close your eyes and make a wish, and if you hold onto it long enough, it will come true. It was just then that Duo was scanning the sky outside, and he saw a blue-tinted streak run across the sky. It was if a star had been shooting across the night. A shooting star, he widened his eyes in surprise before shutting them tightly, and biting his lip. He had to make a wish, and quickly, or it might not come true. It was silly to think that making a wish would make a difference, but he hadn't been sitting up for an hour in this windowsill for nothing. He knew exactly what he wanted to wish for, but he didn't know the right way to word it so that God would understand.  
  
"I . . . I wish that Heero would like m- no, that's not right at all," Duo gripped his eyes tighter down, "I wish we can all just get out of this alive. That's what I really wish for." Duo finished sincerely, turning and opening his eyes sharply when he heard a reaction to his side.  
  
"mmm," Heero mumbled, turning over in his sleep.  
  
"H-heero? You awake?" Duo said stuttering slightly, alarmed, and softly, although apparently not soft enough as the stoic pilot awoke wide-eyed with a questioned, "Hn?"  
  
"Sorry, didn't mean to wake you," the braided one said sincerely, and blushing as the face in darkness pulled up the covers silently and turned to the opposite side. There was an awkward moment of silence.  
  
"Heero?" Duo asked softly, still looking out at the night sky.  
  
"Hn," the lump replied solemnly, refusing to budge.  
  
"Have you ever seen a meteor?" Duo looked from the sky that was scattered with the staggering streaks of light over to the lump.  
  
"That's a stupid question," the wing pilot growled.  
  
". . . from earth," Duo added, too wrapped in the scene unfolding outside to notice the agitated tone and threatening connotation of Heero's words.  
  
"Go to sleep," the perfect soldier commanded, "we have a mission tomorrow. I won't be held responsible if you get killed." Heero finished sharply, taking hold of his gun beneath his pillow and he didn't say another word as Duo let him go back to sleep. The chestnut-haired pilot hardly noticed as his eyes slipped from the window, blurring slightly. He wished nothing had changed. The room wasn't as empty, now, but it had become filled with cold . . . Not that it had been warmer before, but it was a chill no number of blankets could remedy.  
  
~~ end flashback ~~  
  
That was too long ago, and now everything was fine. Heero really had loved Duo, then. He knew that, now, as hard as it might be to believe. Duo smiled as he pointed out the small white tag Heero had sticking out of the front of his shirt. A small blush crept across the smaller boy's nose as he became aware he put it on backwards before he took off and reversed the green t-shirt to its rightful side. It seemed like Heero had changed dramatically, but the strange thing was, Heero -hadn't- changed at all; there was just no reason to hide anything anymore. This is how Heero should have been, Duo thought subtly as he stood in the middle of the room. He wasn't sure what he was waiting for, and to tell the truth, Heero was beginning to wonder the same thing, because Duo was in such a hurry earlier, but had become so caught up in his thoughts that he wasn't really aware of his surroundings. Heero passed the opportunity to wake Duo from his daydreams, and so they were just standing there for no apparent reason, really, when Duo finally took a silent notion that they should really find out what time it was. Looking over at the digital stove clock that read nearly four o'clock, a braid jumped slightly as its owner made a bound for the door, followed closely by a second figure, a little less awake, to whom we are thankful was awake enough to remember to lock the door behind them.  
  
Heero barely realized when it was they got in the car, because when he woke, they were already far away from city lights. Listening to the driver's happy humming of an old Beatles' love tune; he picked his head off the inside of the car door, brushing the cream colored blanket down his arm slightly. He looked at it closely with pleasant surprise, and then at the person who undoubtedly had placed it over him. Duo noticed his consciousness happily, and almost immediately, but chose to finish humming the refrain and give Heero a moment to adjust. There was a moment of silence.  
  
"We're here," Duo said, pressing gently on the breaks, and coming to a slow stop right in the middle of the road.  
  
"Where?" Heero wrinkled his eyebrows slightly as he looked out of his window to the high grasses, and looked across the horizon for the traces of a city. Realizing there really was none, he felt the shaking of the car as Duo exited the car. "Duo?"  
  
Upon hearing no response, the ex-wing pilot opened his door, and stood up, watching as the taller boy sat on the lid of the front of the car.  
  
"Isn't it dangerous to park in the middle of the road like this?" Heero asked, a little annoyed at the loudmouth's lack of response as Duo laid down on the window-shield, arms crossed behind his head.  
  
"Isn't it dangerous to detonate a Gundam when you're still -on- the damn thing?" Duo smirked sarcastically as Heero took a slouched seat next to his ex-partner.  
  
"Did I really do that?" he asked quietly, letting his feet dangle over the edge of the front of the car and kicking them idly, as a child might have, with his hands balancing the weight behind him as he tilted his head back to look at the sky, as Duo seemed to be doing contentedly. The lack of a response from the braided boy told him that he really had done that. Heero supposed it was a silly question, but it was still hard to believe he had such a stubborn streak in him. He looked back to Duo, whose grin had vanished almost as if it never had been there. Clouded violet eyes looked to his own.  
  
"You know, Heero, that's your home up there. Never forget that you'll always belong somewhere," Duo said calmly, "You want to know why I brought you here?"  
  
"The Leonid meteor showers." Heero stated plainly, causing the arms to be unfolded from behind the head of his companion as Duo sat up surprised, and amused, to an extent. Heero didn't want to look straight into the other's eyes because it was just better to imagine the expression painted on that perfectly figured face. "It was pretty obvious as soon as I realized you had led us away from the city."  
  
"Just can't get anything past you, can I?" There was a bit of silence in drowsiness as Duo resumed his comfortable position on the window-shield and both of them looked to the sky, afraid to speak, for fear they would miss the first of the shooting stars in the shower and spoil the moment, but when it was clear that they were still a little early for that, Duo broke the silence. "Do you like it? . . . Looking at the stars, I mean." Heero took his weight off his hands, and took his eyes to the horizon to think.  
  
"I don't know . . . they look kind of lonely to me," Heero paused and pointed, "Like that one, over there."  
  
Duo turned his head to the part of the sky that Heero was looking at, "But there's nothing different about any star over in that direction, and they're all surrounded by other stars, besides." He said patiently, though he wasn't sure he quite understood what Heero was trying to get at.  
  
"You're right," Heero answered, "but they can't see the other side of the sky as easily as we can. There might be something wonderful over there, but even being in the same sky, they might not realize how lonely they are until they reach the other side." Heero stopped, glanced behind at Duo, smiling slightly, and fully at the same time. Duo blinked once or twice before realizing what Heero had meant, and slowly looked back at the stars.  
  
"Yeah," Duo raised a corner of his mouth unconsciously in accepting the truth to what Heero had said, "Sometimes we don't."  
  
The crickets might have sounded, but it was August, and the insects were already making a run for the cold. They couldn't even see the fireflies, or hear any frogs in the marsh nearby. Silence was all that divided them from the world, and brought them together as well. And then it was, amidst the several, though few clouds that littered the sky, that they saw the first meteor shoot brilliant blue; leaving a trail that faded slowly, almost like watercolor paints wash out in a waterfall, and Heero opened his eyes incredulously, "Was that. . .?"  
  
"You know, someone once told me that if you close your eyes and make a wish on the first shooting star that you see from earth, that it'll come true if you really believe in it."  
  
"Why don't you make a wish, Duo?" Heero asked quickly, looking to the violet eyes that were already fixed on him.  
  
"I've seen plenty of shooting stars on earth, and I already made my wish," He said, urging the ex-wing pilot on, "And in all the years I've known you, Heero, you never once looked at the stars from earth. It's way past time you realized that you -do- have a place to go back to. Space is all of our homes."  
  
Heero closed his eyes tight, and then opened one eye to find Duo staring at him, "Duo, this is silly. No one wishes on stars; it's a child's game."  
  
"There's nothing you would wish for?" Duo asked as Heero twisted uncomfortably, adjusting his position on the car.  
  
"Well maybe I would wish for my memory back, if only so I could, well . . ." he looked up, ". . . remember you."  
  
In a matter of moments Heero was consumed by the most breath-staggering, feather-light hug that he had ever felt, and considering his memory of experience, that might not be very significant information, but whatever the hug felt like, the emotion coming from the other side weighted more heavily than the hug itself. Heero felt like melting beneath it, until he wrapped his arms around the other boy, and felt the sharp intakes of breath stagger beneath his hands and the folds of black cloth. Duo didn't seem as tall as he was before, and to the onlooker, the question might have arisen as to who was the more childish of the two of them.  
  
Of course, Duo's sharp breaths subsided quickly, and he pulled away, the tears on his left cheek being swept away by Heero's brown hair as he looked into the cobalt blue with love and fear, all the same.  
  
"Duo?" Heero asked, smiling at the tears of happiness lining the braided one's face, "What was your wish? . . . the first time you saw a shooting star."  
  
"I wished for everything I thought that I could ever want," Duo answered truthfully as he wiped away his tears that have the potential to be seen as a weakness afterwards.  
  
"Did it come true?" Heero asked, putting his arm around the ex-deathscythe pilot's waist.  
  
"It did, Heero," Duo reminisced, looking into Heero's eyes once more, "and proved me wrong, as well."  
  
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Responses (and if you are still reading this, thank you!!)  
  
CSMars: Yeah, I do think that was a bit OOC, too, but I can see him being protective of Relena so much as to do something like that, especially if Relena comes crying to him, and expects him to do something about it. It's not his character speaking, it's his character as an older brother who just had to deal with his little sister who was probably exaggerating the whole thing to an obscene extent. ^^;;  
  
Akennea: Sorry this is so late! I really intended to write more of it earlier, but I'm really glad you enjoyed it. Thanks so much for leaving a review to say so! I'm sorry to say there will be no more Relena Bashing, it was just the last chapter, but I wasn't sure if it was going to work, so I'm really glad you enjoyed that part.  
  
Vampiric Hermit: I'm sorry this is so late! I'm really really really really (this goes on for quite a while) really really sorry!!! I feel really guilty responding when I haven't updated in months, but I'm really glad that you liked it! Thanks so much for reviewing!  
  
Pandora-chan: Thanks so much for you nice reviews! If you're still reading this, then thank you. I'm really scared that no one will. . Yes, Relena ::returns the shudder:: well, lets just be glad she's finally out of the picture. . . and believe me, she is. ^^  
  
Emily Hato: Thanks for reading the first chapter! (Even though the first 4 are really bad, I'll admit.) If you actually read up through the whole thing and are reading this then thank you! I hope you liked it. . . ::hides:: Yes, I know, it's a little sappy ::collapses:: But it's not my fault! ::points to the Beatles songs accusingly:: And see? They did get together ^w^ I love happy endings.  
  
Lady Phoenix Gryffindor: Thanks for leaving a review! I'm glad you like it.  
  
Rez: I'm really really really (I seem to be doing this a lot today) really really sorry this is out so late! ::bows apologetically::  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Ahaa! ::wipes off sweat:: All done. Now that you know my bad updating habits, I'd be willing to send out a e-mail reminder of update to anyone who wants it, as the next update could be days, weeks, err. . .months ^^;;; well, you never know. I can't make any promises. Not that this is a such a good story, so you probably won't want to read anymore, but just in case, I'd be willing to send out an e-mail. Just tell me!  
  
Thanks so much for reading! A review would mean so much! ^_^ 


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